Perhaps what Porter needs is to meet a female abuser. They're rare, but do exist. I once read an absolutely hilarious True Crime book about one. She usually killed people for insurance money, but became tired of her husband. (And I think she had a policy on him, too.)
She first tried poisoning his vitamin capsules. He figured that out, after a couple of trips to the hospital, and just pretended to take them. A friend asked why he didn't leave her, and he said he'd learned not to upset her.
But that wasn't so easy. Finally she put a bomb under his car. Fortunately for him, the sunroof was open. He was propelled through it, and his most serious injury was a broken leg.
He finally saw the light, and filed for divorce from his sickbed...