OT PaulA, you are probably paying way too much for health insurance.
I'm not sure about the state/state differences between NJ and MN, but I'm well over 35, (married but my wife has separate coverage through her employer), have a $3,000 deductible with 20% co-pay of the next $7,000 (hence max $4,400 o-o-p), and I pay $178/month premium.
Are you all by yourself on that policy? Insurance companies tend to set very high premiums for individuals. If you can find some group, (any group! church, fraternal, any legitimate employment, Mystic Knights of the Sea?), in which to claim membership and buy through, you may be able to drive your premiums down.
good luck,
phill