Replies to post #103264 on Rants and Raves

[teapeebubbles]

A crusty old marine found himself at a gala event hosted
by a local liberal arts college.

There was no shortage of extremely young idealistic ladies
in attendance, one of whom approached the marine for
conversation. "Excuse me, Sir, but you seem to be a very
serious man is something bothering you?"

"Negative, ma'am. Just serious by nature."

The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and
said, "It looks like you have seen a lot of action."

"Yes, ma'am, a lot of action."

The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation,
said, "You know, you should lighten up a little; relax and
enjoy yourself."

The old marine just stared at her in his serious manner.

Finally the young lady said, "You know, I hope you don't
take this the wrong way, but when is the last time you had
sex?"

"1955, ma'am."

"Well, there you are. You really need to chill out and
quit taking everything so seriously!...I mean, no sex
since 1955!

She took his hand and led him to a private room where she
proceeded to 'relax' him several times. Afterwards, panting
for breath, she leaned against his bare chest and said,
"Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955!"

The marine, glancing at his watch, said in his serious
voice, "I hope not, it's only 2130 now."

[teapeebubbles]

A bloke is sat at a bar when he sees this gorgeous
woman waiting for her date. He decides to go over and
chat her up.

'I think you're wasting your time, I'm only interested
in women' said the woman.

'Oh come on, I bet I can change your mind' said the bloke.
After ten minutes of the bloke pestering her, she had had
enough.

'OK' said the woman 'I'll sleep with you if you can do
anything for me that my vibrator can't!'

'OK, barman get this lady a drink' he said. 'let's see
your vibrator do that?'