I'm sorry but Crazy Guggenheim is classic and I think it's time you came out of the closet.
On your short pumper bit, I decided to join your cause... sorta, so I've now got ads planned to run in the help wanted sections in every pink colored daily newspapers I can find, my search for them starts in 'Frisco, offering my services, at .10 US per negatory post, and the same per reply.