gtcstorm....sorry, but I don't know of an expressed opinion on a board with which I disagree more. Your feelings are obviously based on your experiences, and the reality you perceive. We are anonymous on the web, indeed....but personalities can be discerned, and empathy felt.
Please forgive me if I offend you in any way by the following commment..believe me, there is no offense intended.
You may be in a period of depression. That is not a fault or a flaw..just something that is a state of being. Please understand that those in depression may not realize it themselves, and in fact, be in denial.
If you have a trusted one, ask them if they think this may be the case.......and if so, please see your doctor and reveal your thoughts to him/her as you have to us. Best Wishes.
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