On the WBAM FM Morning Show in Chicago, the DJs
play a game with listeners called "Mate Match".
While on the air, the DJs call someone at random
and ask if they are married or seriously involved
with someone.
If the listener answers "yes", he or she is then
asked three highly personal questions. The person
is also asked to divulge the name of their partner
and their phone number. The DJs then call the
"mate", ask them the same series of questions,
and if their answers "match", the couple wins a
big prize.
Here's how a recent game went:
DJ: "Hey! This is Edgar on WBAM. Have you
ever heard of 'Mate Match'?"
CONTESTANT: (laughing) "Yes, I have."
DJ: "Great! Then you know we're giving
away a five-day all-expenses paid
trip to Orlando, Florida if you win.
What's your name? First only please."
CONTESTANT: "Brian."
DJ: "Brian, are you married or what?"
BRIAN: "Yes."
DJ: "Yes? Does that mean you're married
or you're what?"
BRIAN: (laughing nervously) "Yes, I am married."
DJ: "Thank you. Now, what is your wife's
name? First only please."
BRIAN: "Sara."
DJ: "Is Sara at work, Brian?"
BRIAN: "She is gonna kill me."
DJ: "Stay with me here, Brian! Is she at
work?"
BRIAN: (laughing) "Yes, she's at work."
DJ: "Okay, first question - when was the
last time you had sex?"
BRIAN: "She is gonna kill me."
DJ: "Brian! Stay with me here!"
BRIAN: "About 8 o'clock this morning."
DJ: "Atta boy, Brian."
BRIAN: (laughing sheepishly) "Well..."
DJ: "Question #2 - How long did it last?"
BRIAN: "About 10 minutes."
DJ: "Wow! You really want that trip, huh?
No one would ever have said that if a
free trip to Florida wasn't at stake."
BRIAN: "Yeah, that trip sure would be nice."
DJ: "Okay. Final question. Where did you
have sex at 8 o'clock this morning?"
BRIAN: (laughing hard) "I, ummm, I, well..."
DJ: "This sounds good, Brian. Where was
it at?"
BRIAN: "Not that it was all that great, but
her mom is staying with us for a
couple of weeks..."
DJ: "Uh huh..."
BRIAN: "...and her mother was in the shower
at the time."
DJ: "Atta boy, Brian."
BRIAN: "On the kitchen table."
DJ: "Not that great?? That's more adventure
than the previous 100 times I've done
it!! Okay folks, I'm going to put Brian
on hold, get his wife's work number and
call her. You can listen in."
DJ: "Okay audience, let's call Sarah, shall
we?" (touch tones.....ringing....)
CLERK: "Good Morning, Kinkos."
DJ: "Hey, is Sarah around there somewhere?"
CLERK: "Yes, just a moment."
SARAH: "Hi, this is Sarah"
DJ: "Sarah, this is Edgar with WBAM. We are
live on the air right now and I've been
talking with Brian for a couple of hours
now."
SARAH: (laughing) "A couple of hours?"
DJ: "Well, a while. He's on the line with us
now. Brian knows not to give any answers
away or you'll lose. Sooooooo... do you
know the rules of 'Mate Match'?"
SARAH: "No."
DJ: "Good!"
BRIAN: (laughing)
SARAH: (laughing) "Brian, what the hell are you
up to?"
BRIAN: (laughing) "Just answer his questions
honestly, okay? Be completely honest."
DJ: "Yeah yeah yeah. Sure. Now, I will ask
you 3 questions, Sarah. If your answers
match Brian's answers, then the both of
you will be off to Orlando, Florida for
5 days on us. Disney World. Sea World.
Tickets to the Magic's game. The whole
deal. Get it Sarah?"
SARAH: (laughing) "Yes."
DJ: "Alright. When did you last have sex,
Sarah?"
SARAH: "Oh God, Brian....uh, this morning
before Brian went to work."
DJ: "What time?"
SARAH: "Around 8 this morning."
DJ: "Very good. Next question. How long
did it last?"
SARAH: "12, 15 minutes maybe."
DJ: "Hmmmm. That's close enough. I am sure
she is trying to protect his manhood.
We've got one last question, Sarah.
You're one question away from a trip
to Florida. Are you ready?"
SARAH: (laughing) "Yes."
DJ: "Where did you have it?"
SARAH: "OH MY GOD, BRIAN!! You didn't tell
them that, did you?"
BRIAN: "Just tell him, honey."
DJ: "What's bothering you so much, Sarah?"
SARAH: "Well, it's just that my mom is
vacationing....
DJ: Come on Sarah.....where did you have
it?
SARAH: "In the ass....."
After a long pause, the DJ said, "Folks, we need
to take a station break"
AI
