Replies to post #7541 on The Confessional

[teapeebubbles]

Very Short Book Lists

* Different Ways to Spell "Bob"
* A Guide to Arab Democracies
* Career Opportunities for History Majors
* Dr. Kevorkian's Collection of Motivational Speeches
* French Hospitality
* Popular Lawyers
* The Amish Phone Book
* Everything Men Know About Women

[teapeebubbles]

A woman went to a lawyer to discuss divorcing her husband.
"Don't you love him anymore?" asked the lawyer.

"Oh, I still love him," the chick replied. "But all he
ever wants is sex, I can't take it."

"Instead of divorcing him why don't you try charging him
every time he wants to make love?" the lawyer suggested.

The exhausted wife decided to give the plan a try. As soon
as she walked into the house that night her husband put
the hard word on her.

"Not so fast," she replied. "From now on it'll be $10 in
the kitchen, $20 in the living room and $50 in the bed-
room."

"Well, then," he said. "Here's $50."

The wife began walking to the bedroom.

"Hold on," he said, grabbing her hand. "That'll be five
times in the kitchen!"

[teapeebubbles]

During one of her daily classes, a teacher, trying to
teach good manners, asked her students the following
question: "Michael, if you were on a date having dinner
with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you
have to go to the bathroom?"

Michael said, "Just a minute, I have to go pee."

The teacher responded by saying, "That would be rude and
impolite."

"What about you Peter, how would you say it?" Peter said,
"I'm sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I'll
be right back."

"That's better" she said, "but it's still not very nice
to use the word bathroom at the dinner table."

"And you, little Eddie, can you use your brain for once
and show us your good manners?"

I would say, "Darling, may I please be excused for a
moment? I have to go shake hands with a very dear friend
of mine, whom I look forward to introducing you to right
after dinner."

The teacher was speechless.