Joe, let me suggest that what it will take for you to get and stay out of jail is a major attitude shift on your part.
Some of the components are:
1. Quit boasting about what you have and how that makes you better than other people. You not only sound stupid, you show a total lack of class. When's the last time you heard Warren Buffett or Bill Gates or Jack Welch boasting about their million dollar mansion? The truly rich don't need to boast, and those who need to boast aren't truly rich no matter how much money they have.
2. Take that asinine "Gordon Gekko Style" descriptor off your profile. If you don't mean it, it's dumb. If you do mean it, you'll never stay out of jail for more than a few days at a time. Find a hero worth emulating. (Hint: Gekko ain't it. Try somebody like Buffett, Lynch, O'Neill, Ellis Traub, or others who have proved that you can be both a successful investor and a decent person.)
3. Realize that no matter how much you think you know, to most of the adults here you're still just a green sprig on the tree of life. I, for one, have lived more than two of your lifetimes, and if I felt inclined to do so, which frankly I don't, the reality is that I could teach you a hell of a lot about investing and business management and economics and all that stuff that I've been involved in successfully for longer than you've been alive. Quit pretending -- hell, quit thinking -- that you know it all, and spend some time learning. There's a reason people say that the young should be seen and not heard. And when you do venture an opinion, do it with humility, not with arrogance.
4. Be polite. I know it's totally out of character for you, but try it.
5. Finally, take the advice of Flanders and Swann, who said "always be sincere, whether you mean it or not."
I expect I've totally wasted five minutes, but maybe there's a smidgen of a chance that I haven't, in which case it will have been worth it.
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