dd, too friggen funny, how about this one.
This ol'boy recently picked a new primary care physician. After two visits and exhaustive lab tests, the Doc said he was doing "fairly well" for his age.
A little concerned about that comment, He couldn't resist asking the Doc, "Do you think I'll live to be 80?"
The Doc asked," Well, do you smoke Cuban Cigars?" "Throw all your money away in the stock market chasing dreams and following crimbs and Naz's stock picks?" "Do you ever read Dim's charts?" "Do you drink Beer, Wine and Busted's Martinis with cocktail onions and mushrooms like they're water?"
"Oh no," He replied. "I've never done either."
Then the Doc asked, "Do you eat rare rib-eye steaks and barbecued ribs?" "Do you eat Turkey's half cooked smoked turkeys that would gag a she hound dog in heat"
He said "No, I've heard that all red meat is very unhealthy!"
"Do you spend a lot of time in the sun, like playing
golf/sailing/ballooning/rock climbing ?"
'No, I don't," He said.
The Doc said, "Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or sexually fool around and maybe once-in-a-while eat a muff pie?"
"No," he said "I've never done any of those things."
The Doc looked at him and said,
"Well then, why do you give a shit if you live to be 80?"
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