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shajandr

03/11/21 3:02 PM

#379507 RE: shajandr #379506

One last inside beisbol war story item before I am hitten DaHay for a cuppla more hours of sleepy-bye time.

I've litigated in Chicago several times. Always complex binniss/IP cases. I've had to spend Christmas in Chicago one year because of a case that was ongoing and did nott allow me time to catcha flight home for Christmas and then be back for the resumption on the 27th, so I stayed over. The case carried over (with breaks) from early December thru early March of the following year with many week breaks for people's schedules and appeals of matters that the 7th Circuit needed to rule upon before the case could proceed further.

On that ONE case, the hotel bill ALONE (which I had to sign for) for our litigation team, which included some suites and a large war room with our paralegals, a graphic artist, a cuppla secretary/typists, and IT staff plus copy machines, etc. AND included room service - came to a tad over $550,000. That was JUST for the hotel bill. And that was at a pre-negotiated DISCOUNT rate from the hotel. It also included rooms for some witnesses we had to fly in (sometimes several times because of scheduling and one witness's wife had a medical emergency so he had to fly home for her and then back again to CONtinue his testimony later). Still, that's a lott of munny just for hotel rooms and room service.

The rolled-up entire cost of the litigation (USA only, and there was also roughly the same case in Germany for the EU which is NOTT INCLUDED in this amount) topped $24,000,000 just for our client.

Now Coyote's CJA crackerjack, Nishay Sanan, if I unnerstann the CJA payment plan correctly, is allowed a cap of only $11,800 for a complete felony case defense. That's it. Now he getts reimbursed for costs, like the hard drives, copying, postage, etc. - butt his own billable time is capped at $11,800 for a felony case. Now, I suspect that he can petition DaJudge to exceed that cap if he can show reasons why he needs more billable time - and a 1+ terabyte disclosure wood prolly be a good excuse to have DaJudge approve some additional hours.

Butt ... and it's a big butt ... my point is that compared to a quality white collar/securities lawyer that some dude with millions stashed away would retain, the CJA crackerjack doesn't have a lott of time to devote to the case, nor motivation. So relying on a CJA crackerjack to defend you in a Federal felony case is a really stoopid thing to do if you had the means to afford a private criminole defense attorney with white collar/securities specialty.

Same dealio with the SEC case. Coyote wisely retained Shipley, butt then Coyote couldn't pay him, so Shipley bounced. CJA lawyers are only approved in criminole cases, the SEC case is civil. So now, Coyote is doing the absolutely dumbest thing ever, which is to represent himself (pro se) in the SEC case. He has already taken the Fifth in that case, so he cannot testify. So what can he offer in defense? Will he try to cross-examine witnesses himself? This wood be very funny to observe. Butt he won't. He's a psychopath sure, butt nott a Ted Bundy psychopath (who defended himself in a CRIMINAL case and cross-examined witnesses - and we all know how Ted wound up).

Coyote is brokeass beyond brokeass. He is stuck with Nishay (for now, until Coyote tries to disqualify him later as a delay tactic to buy more free time). And ole (young) Nishay getts paid squat as a CJA lawyah and has a very low total billing cap. DaCoyote is in a very, very badd spott.

I don't do criminole. Not at all. I am in an extremely specialized segment of DaBiz, and criminole ain't no part of it.

However, if Coyote has $24,550,000 in Bitcoin squirreled away in his sofa seat cushions, I'd be willing to give it a go for him - with the entire $24,500,000 paid upfront as a retainer before I lift a finger.

Dave, this is your chance if you can round up $24,550,000 in Bitcoin or cash via wire transfer (don't let Aaron "Wire Transfer" Taylor be responsible for doing it tho). Besides, I think it wood be fun to do a criminole coyote case in Chicago. My first criminole case ever. So I may need some tutorisng from a colleague as second chair. Butt that' all rolled up in the $24,550,000. This does knott include any post-CONviction appellate work.

Think onit, Dave. You know how to reach me via late night drunken PM.

(Note: The above is nott an advertisement, offer of services, nor solicitation, it is a rhetorical device used to illustrate Coyote's badd, really badd predicament.)