"Only benevolent government geniuses can protect us." Please please dear government! Help me! I can't untie my shoelaces! You tied them for me earlier in the day but then you left me to be on my own! Now how can you expect me to handle this mess? I'm just a small time person with a brain. And you said, mr government, that we need more than brains in order to untie our shoelaces. You said we need government to do that for us, because our brains might tell is the wrong way to do the untying, and that could be dangerous. So hear I am waiting for your help. I only hope you hired enough government employee union workers to help all the millions of people who own shoes untie them every day. And please keep your shoelaces.gov website active because it is very helpful in telling us all about the many dangers of shoelaces and of untying them tok quickly or too slowly. I have increased voluntarily the amount I will pay you in taxes this year, mr government monopoly, because your services are so very important. I don't think the biology of any human body could sustain life without your constant guidance and the protection you give us from all of those people who try to get us to wrongfully spend our nickels and dimes. And in my opinion, having your protection against potentially losing nickels and dimes here and there is certainly worth the many thousands of dollars I pay you in taxes every year. How can I thank you? Humbly, I cannot. So instead I'll ask you for one more piece of help. Mr. Government, what does "caveat emptor" mean? Can you translate that for me? I don't know if it's english or what but I do know I'm supposed to go to you when I have questions about anything. Thank you again.
-yours truly (meaning I definitely belong to you, not to myself, thankfully)
Schmoe
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