Obama is my Shepherd; I shall not work. He maketh me to lie down and watch Oprah: He leadeth me beside the still factories. He restoreth my bling: He leadeth me in the paths of idleness for Barack’s name sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the sharing of the wealth, I will fear no workfare: For thou art funding me; Thy lies and thy blade, they comfort me. Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of people who actually produce; Thou annointest my teeth with gold; My pipe runneth over. Surely rebates and Earned Income Credits shall follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the House of the Obama forever.