Outdoor Adventures

[trkyhntr]

I am attaching an excerpt from a story I wrote about machines, Justin. I owned a "Meager One" at one time.


"As an example of what I mean when I say that machines don’t like me, I cite the lawnmower I bought from Sears way back in the mid 1960’s. The company had placed their reputation on this mower, calling it the “EAGER ONE.” An advertisement on television at the time showed a whole bunch of them on a football field. An attractive (is there any other kind on television?) person went to each of them in turn and they started the very first pull of the starter cord. The message was clear. This mower will start the first time, every time. I have a vision of me yanking on the starter cord and shouting at the top of my lungs, “Dirty ratsafratz! Ramafackalomer! Filoramic packalomer!” I am here to tell you that mower didn’t start the first pull any time I ever pulled the cord. It was so disgusting that Doris took a marking pen and printed a big “M” in front of EAGER, thus changing the mower’s name to MEAGER ONE. Doris and I went to Sears to see what could be done about this reluctant mower and were told that it probably needed a “cold start kit.” This was also remarkable, in that it was June when we were told this. I gave up and got a refund."
When the salesman asked what I was going to do with the refund, I replied, "Buy a Lawn Boy." I did, and the Lawn Boy lasted 12 years.