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Intruder Alert! Intruder Alert!
"This board is for the old timers here. Other may lurk, but only old timers may post."
Matt, you gotta be qualified to post here. Further violations may result in you being reported to the iHub Admin. I guarantee you do NOT want him on your case! It would be like looking in a mirror and talking to yourself.
AK
Well Fred (and Churak), you know what the frogs say:
"Time’s fun when you’re having flies!"
AK
Arthur Godfrey? Shouldn't your post be on the Elder Old-Timers' thread?
AK
Fred, please don't squeeze my bottled up feelings. I have thin skin since I lost my job at the orange juice factory, and I'm not sure the humor is apeeling. I got canned because I couldn't concentrate.
AK
Bob never slapped you? <g>
Yeah, and you certainly know about moderators, right? <g>
AK
Uhh, Zabuta, it may be 3:30, but today is MONDAY. You been asleep since FRIDAY? A few of us AK's have been around. <g>
AK
MRVL. [Briefing.com] October 14, 2002 3:58:00 PM ET
Marvell (MRVL) 11.52 -2.24: Stock drops off over 16% following Friday's announcement MRVL had renegotiated its relationship with INTC allowing both parties to sell their own GigE NIC/LOM solutions without INTC having to give MRVL 12-months notice. Several analysts remain upbeat on co's near-term prospects: Goldman Sachs believes the INTC relationship "is far from over" and expects no revenue impact from the amendment until H203 at the earliest. Firm maintains their estimates where they are given the likelihood of further upside in the near-term. CIBC similarly believes the perceived impact on financials and decline in stock price may be overblown and maintains their Mkt Outperform rating.
Like I said...
#msg-537737
AK
That's what you say now, but wait 'till he writes one about you!
AK
Count your blessings Churak...here's Fred's doggerel to me when we first "met" on iHub:
"I don't know vat's a kvetch
Nor do I give a fig
When kvetch's come with funny things
That make my smile big
So come and visit when you can
And take the time to fetch
The jokes that stir the soul of man
And you'll be welcome ... wretch"
-- Koikaze
You are losing it Churak. Aren't you just visiting today? Guess Matt kept you here so long you got used to this place, but if it's solitary you want, please address a properly worded message to Fred.
AK
p.s. If you want REAL punishment, ask Fred for some doggerel.
Fred, it's been quiet here because the few remaining prisoners have been using their cell phones.
AK
You mean I can get "pre-approval" of that flame for your thread?
AK
That would be about as effective as Matt screening yours. <g>
AK
p.s. Please note the deliberate ambiguity by my use of the word "yours".
Hasher, you think that was "an attempt to not be censored"? Sorry, but that post was purely tongue-in-cheek. Notice what I wrote:
I suppose some might consider it a "personal attack"
and then read the very first words of the flame <g>.
In any case, wish I could give credit to the author of that flame; I lifted it from S.I. over a year ago.
You have, however, put forth an interesting idea -- "Pre-Approved Flames". Something to take up with iHub management.
AK
See #msg-537350. Zeev sold.
Nope...Fish...
Fish: a new inmate
http://dictionary.prisonwall.org/
A blonde who got a fishing rod for her birthday decided to go ice fishing to make good use of her gift. Early the next morning, she got all her gear together and headed out to the ice.
When she reached her final destination, she cut a large hole in the ice and dipped the rod in. Then suddenly she heard a voice that said: "There are no fish in there".
So she moves to another spot and cuts another hole, but then the same voice spoke again and told her there were no fish in there.
So she moves again, and the voice tells her there are no fish in there. So she looks up and sees an irritated man staring down at her.
"How do you know there are no fish there?" asks the blonde.
So the man cooly says "Well first of all, this is a hockey rink, and second of all, you're going to have to pay for those holes."
Alexed, we need to keep cultural perspective:
The Italian says, "I'm tired and thirsty. I must have wine."
The Frenchman says, "I'm tired and thirsty. I must have cognac."
The Russian says, "I'm tired and thirsty. I must have vodka."
The German says, "I'm tired and thirsty. I must have beer."
The Mexican says, "I'm tired and thirsty. I must have tequila."
The Jew says, "I'm tired and thirsty. I must have diabetes."
Well Fred, you have indeed delivered my comeuppance...
doggy style.
Say, how's your dictionary search going for "awierd"? #msg-535365
If you think it would help, I have a new search engine. It's a motorized magnifying glass.
AK
Guess you don't have the night-time problem we have over here. In fact, we have a saying, "One good turn... gets all the blankets."
Jus' waitin' for Jeopardy to come on; most of the folks in the home are a sleepin' in their chairs. Shhsh, they don't know I'm using the Administrator's computer. Fred, you gotta get me out of here!!
Fred, can't find "awierd" in my dictionary. Please explain. And remember:
An unemployed jester is nobody's fool.
AK
Anybody know what this error message means?
"Your program has performed an illegal operation. Consult a lawyer."
AK
A good pun is it's own re-word.
Here's a list of popular "punnies" making the rounds again (and again <g>) that were posted on this thread last January: see #msg-243114
AK
p.s. I am just teasing, of course. Keep 'em comin'. All my material has been plagiarized...
Phil, I'll admit that singin' those words to the melody helps, but even knowing the answer, I don't get it <g>. Well, perhaps that's an overstatement--if it needs so much help with an explanation, it doesn't belong in the punsters' Hall of Shame.
Oh, I get it now. We turn up the music real loud, act like we're hard of hearing, fill in the gaps, and bingo, it all makes sense! <vbg>
(BoP, hope you don't read the Old Timers thread...)
Amazing how stuff goes around, even on this very thread <g>.
See #msg-279843
AK
p.s. And at that, it was used before on this thread.
Yup -- see #msg-527071 <vbg>
AK
Brothel Parrot
A woman went to a pet shop and immediately spotted a
large beautiful parrot. There was a sign on the cage
that said $50.00.
"Why so little," she asked the pet store owner.
The owner looked at her and said, "Look, I should tell
you first that this bird used to live in a house of
prostitution, and sometimes it says some pretty vulgar
stuff."
The woman thought about this, but decided she had to
have the bird anyway. She took it home and hung the
bird's cage up in her living room and waited for it to
say something.
The bird looked around the room, then at her, and
said, "New house, new madam."
The woman was a bit shocked at the implication, but
then thought "that's not so bad."
When her two teenage daughters returned from school
the bird saw them and said, "New house, new madam, new
whores."
The girls and the woman were a bit offended but then
began to laugh about the situation.
Moments later, the woman's husband, Keith, came home
from work.
The bird looked at him and said, "Hi Keith."
Bird of Prey, you must have seen this...
http://www.utahbirds.org/BirdStory.htm
AK
Real Birds of Prey
http://www.utahbirds.org/BirdStory.htm
Think Bob is suggesting that size matters?
AK
Fred, maybe it's an "open ended" survey, for people who like to write doggeral? <g>
AK
(Bob Z, just making a joke here...)
Churak, my problem with BoP's post is that even knowing the answer, I don't get it <g>.
AK
Elmer, don't feel bad; I had to research the lyrics. Hmmm, wonder if Bird of Prey sang in the church choir? <g>
AK
Elmer, the Good King Wenceslas Christmas carol lyrics start with:
"Good King Wenceslas looked out,
On the Feast of Stephen,
When the snow lay round about,
Deep and crisp and even; ..."
An Indian chief was feeling very sick, so he summoned the medicine
man. After a brief examination, the medicine man took out a long,
thin strip of elk hide and gave it to the chief, instructing him to
bite off, chew and swallow one inch of the leather every day. After
a month, the medicine man returned to see how the chief was feeling.
The chief shrugged and said, "The thong is ended, but the malady
lingers on."