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That man Jim, he been out in the storm way too long; must be tough hangin' on to that little dinghy, don'cha tink?
(And you badger me about re-posting!)
AK
You lie!
Churak, you seen her picture wearing her Mrs. Claus outfit?
http://www.scc-csc.gc.ca/details/mclachlin-double_e.html
AK
Churak, it was only hours ago when you posted this: #msg-543262
Obviously you have now taken your medication, and at least you now have some semblance of clarity.
Wow, you sure know a lot for a Canuk-nit -- she's The Right Honourable Chief Justice of Canada, Beverley McLachlin, P.C.
AK
p.s. Does P.C. mean Politically Correct? Why put that in her title? She should be a snowbird and spend time (with Matt) in Florida.
Yes, you do. I apologize. I was misinformed. Churak doesn't help much either. I think the only province he can spell is Nunavut. That's probably because of all the gold mining stocks he's chased on the VANCOUVER exchange.
http://atlas.gc.ca/site/english/maps/peopleandsociety/nunavut/mining/mineralexploration?map=/home/ma...
Guess I can count on you for misinformation -- it's in Ontario, unless they moved Ottawa.
http://atlas.gc.ca/site/english/maps/reference/provincesterritories/ontario
Omigosh, somebody who has volunteered to be incarcerated. The times are a'changin'.......
AK
And this could be the reason why: #msg-543389
AK
Midget Buys a Horse
This guy owns a horse stud farm, and gets a call from a friend. " I know this midget with a speech impediment who wants to buy a horse, I'm sending him over."
Midget arrives, and the owner asks if he wants a male or female horse.
"A female horth," the midget replies. So the owner shows him one.
"Nith looking horth, can I see her mouth?"
So the owner picks up the midget and shows him the horse's mouth.
"Nith mouth. Can I see her eyesth?" So the owner picks up the midget and
shows the eyes.
"OK, what about the earsth?" Now the owner is getting pissed, but he picks
up the midget one more time and shows the ears.
"OK, finally, I'd like to see her twat."
With that, the owner picks up the midget and shoves his head up the horse's
tw-t, then pulls him out.
Shaking his head, the midget says, "Perhapth I should rephrase. I'd like to
see her run!"
Hmmmm, I need to check on something...apologies may be due, but maybe not...and I am resonably sure Churak is not right (well, we knew that) about Nut-i-Peg.
AK
Hasher, you a Canuck??...youse guys don't have a Supreme Court...
AK
With 6 ex's, you seem to know the drill...
AK
Somebody was talking to you?
Are you guys aquaintances, friends, foes, enemies, competetors [sic]. what???
This is cyberspace. What would you like us to be?
AK
...despite the fact that you plagiarized me but I am man enough to give you your due...
You just don't get it, do you? No wonder Fred seems so resigned, err, I mean, no wonder Fred resigned.
AK
Figures you are trying to duck out without a trial. But in response to your post, nice that Hacker ruled in my favor, but I was only an visitor in his courtroom, and he just thought I was the Plaintiff. His verdict was based on mistaken identity, and therefore has no force or effect. I was also told the Judge in that courtroom was on potty break, and the bailiff let hasher sit in the Judge's chair just to see what it was like, so it also appears that hasher had no vested authority.
As to whether Fred is empowered to be the Judge, may I remind you of this post (to you) and the now reinstated Warden, Matt Brown.
See #msg-528690
AK
(And you need not apply for a position as a legal researcher, but I doubt that would be your favorite position anyway.)
Case closed.
I must be in the wrong courtroom. Churak, I thought our case was before Judge Fred, and it was to be later today.
However, inasmuch as hasher5 has interposed himself into the dispute, I am considering filing a cross-complaint, or perhaps calling him as a hostile witness.
If you have any thoughts, post them here. I'd like to keep the issues as straightforward as possible for Judge Fred; I do fear that hasher5 may obfuscate things, although he is clearly the instigator in this whole sordid episode with his unreasonable belief that I am Karnack.
I am also considering bring suit against him for the "Churakvetch" reference, but I think he know not what of he speaketh (pardon my lisp).
AK
Cheap shot Churak. I do advise you to be more circumspect in your personal attacks. I do expect the Court to rule against you on the Jailhouse thread later today. Actually I was going to compliment you for digging up some material fresh, but ...
Last night I was listening to the short-wave radio, and found an English broadcast from Israel. I may not have heard it correctly, but I thought they said, "This is Radio Tel Aviv, 1500 on your AM dial, but for YOU, 1495."
AK
With the news that the Chinese are beginning to develop products that in a few years will be better than what is produced by INTC ...
Please provide the "news" you have referred to and/or a link to it. Thanks.
AK
Ahh, Judge Fred is up! A case is about to be presented to you on The Jailhouse thread. I have been slandered by former inmate Churak, and he refuses to issue a retraction. I will prepare a brief for you and request you issue a summons to Churak. Hopefully we can make our respective presentations to you this afternoon or evening. I trust you will be available? I will request that all court costs be paid by the losing party.
AK
"Don't be a Churak"
Patience Churak. I have to write "letters" to Judge Fred who is leading a support group Acronymics Anonymous. Hopefully he will be available for an evening session of the Court. See you there!
AK
p.s. No Levi's or capris please! (I know you have a tendency to be capricious, Alice.)
SEE YOU IN COURT!
Where's da judge? I need a summons issued.
AK
I did; you didn't; but you know that now.
AK
p.s. And don't call me Roger
FINAL NOTICE: Re-check your facts, issue an apology, or I will take this matter to The Jailhouse Kangeroo Court (remember their motto "A bent stick can be a boomerang.") with Judge Fred presiding.
AK
"Don't be a Churak"
You are implying, I take it, that your facts were NOT CORRECT, and that the "stow throne" story I posted was NOT THE ONE you accused me of posting?
Thank you for clarifying this situation.
AK
Remember: "Don't be a Churak"
What goes around comes around...unless of course it is just a stick.
Churak, is a boomerang not merely a bent stick?
AK
JAIL just ain't what it used to be...
Churak, are you looking to be returned to the Jail as a guest, rather than a visitor? I am concerned about your making FALSE ACCUSATIONS!
You have slanderously stated that I have plagiarized a joke that you lifted from elsewhere. (It is not my style to steal material from YOU, primarily because I can usually find where you have stolen it from.) To wit, you have stated as A FACT that I have used a joke you (at least I presume it's you) posted on Raging Bull.
FIRST, I do not read Raging Bull. Why should I when I have iHub? (Matt, you reading this?)
SECOND, I have seen the disgusting attempt at a pun that you(?) posted there.
THIRD, that shaggy dog story is so bad I would never think of using it.
FOURTH, AS A FACT, I HAVE NEVER POSTED SAID STORY!
THEREFORE, I (strongly) suggest you check your facts, and then immediately issue a PUBLIC apology on this thread, and further request that you check your facts before making such unfounded accusations.
Thank you for your anticipated immediate attention to this matter.
Sincerely,
AK
p.s. "Don't act like a Churak!"
Fred misspoke. The thing he is resigned to is doggerel. He visits here for punitence. JMHO
AK
I don't believe Larry makes predictions. He generously provides the chart with an observation, and leaves it to the user to make their own interpretation and act on the information as they see fit. If I'm wrong, I am sure Larry will correct me.
AK
Hasher, here is one for you and the Warden. Lucky for Fred I'm only visiting.
================
There once was a poor shepherd named Yorgi. The only food he had to sustain himself on was the milk he got from the sheep, and it tasted so bad that he could barely drink it. As a result, Yorgi became thin and sickly.
One day, he met his friend Vladimir. Vladimir was a poor shepherd like himself, but he was hearty and healthy. Vladimir told him that he had to live on sheep's milk too, but he let him on a secret: a witch in a nearby village taught him a magic spell that makes sheep's milk taste as sweet as the richest cream. Yorgi begged Vladimir to teach him the spell, which his friend did willingly.
Sure enough, Yorgi's sheep produced the most delicious milk he ever tasted. Yorgi loved it so much, that he drank it by the liter. He milked his sheep so much that they cried out in pain. Yorgi realized that he couldn't make his sheep suffer like that, so he reversed the spell and resigned himself to drinking normal sheep's milk.
Now there's no ewes crying over spelled milk.
I sure hope you are going to tell me; I'd be up all night counting answers.
In any case, it can't be worse than this:
Did you hear about the shepherd who drove his flock through town, and got a traffic ticket for making a ewe turn.
AK
Fred, you are quoting an old movie star from before my time? Gee, thanks! But if it's a quote you want, see if you can relate to this one:
"If a farmer fills his barn with grain, he gets mice. If he leaves it empty, he gets actors."
--Sir Walter Scott
AK
Did you ever fill in for Karnack on Johnny Carson?
Nah, you'll try to swim away to save yourself.
AK
p.s. Did it occur to you that these posts would not look so bad if you took your glasses off?
Fred, better get that motorized magnifying glass out and do a better search.
del·phin·i·um Pronunciation Key (dl-fn-m)
n.
A plant of the genus Delphinium, especially any of several tall cultivated varieties having palmate leaves and long racemes of showy, variously colored spurred flowers. Also called larkspur.
AK
Is this close enough?
Then there was the ship carrying red paint that collided with another carrying blue paint. Both crews were marooned.
AK
Uhhh, cowsas, as they say on the farm?
AK
Where the heck is the "Next" button?
Not nice Fred. At least Churak provided usable links, although I grant you he did make sausage of his post.
AK
Hi Fred. A still shorter suggestion was made. See #msg-541784
AK
p.s. I have a lot of trouble growing delphiniums; they look like weeds or carrot tops until they bloom. Just curious, do you "grow your own"?
The latest celebrity on television is a Russian, going by the name of Rudolph, who has taken the weather forecasting world by storm. He seems to have an incredible and uncanny knack of not just getting the forecast correct, but being amazingly accurate, sometimes even being able to tell where the rain will fall down to the nearest mile or so.
His fame was enhanced by his personality - being Russian, he had some unique turns of phrase. He was also a fanatical communist.
One day, one of his younger fans was watching with his parents. Young James turned to his mother, and asked "How does he manage to get the weather forecast so good?"
His mother thought for a bit and said, "I'm not sure, but one thing's for certain - Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear."