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Guess not have not seen since he went in !!
When detail man was a little boy on the farm
detail man comes down to breakfast. Since they live on a farm, his mother asks if he had done his chores.
"Not yet," said detail man.
His mother tells him no breakfast until he does his chores.
Well, he's a little pissed off, so he goes to feed the chickens, and he kicks a chicken. He goes to feed the cows, and he kicks a cow. He goes to feed the pigs, and he kicks a pig. He goes back in for breakfast and his mother gives him a bowl of dry cereal.
"How come I don't get any eggs and bacon? Why don't I have any milk in my cereal?" he asks.
"Well," his mother says, "I saw you kick a chicken, so you don't get any eggs for a week. I saw you kick the pig, so you don't get any bacon for a week either. I saw you kick the cow so for a week you aren't getting any milk."
Just then, his father comes down for breakfast and kicks the cat halfway across the kitchen.
detail man looks up at his mother with a smile, and says, "You gonna tell him or should I?"
Has Stevo51 catched his breath yet?
Just a snack on Super Bowl Sunday........
http://www.food.com/recipe/awesome-sauce-chicken-wings-412072
Check out Django !!
Nice !! Check out SRV & Albert !!
What do they call that......77???????, where you get ate (8) more?
You got it J - Now the question is where does mac get all the BS to eat?
I always wondered why Marks ate so much fruit?
Doctors for years now say you are what you eat.
So where does MAC buy his miserable mean bastard from?
I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes.
How true !! LOL
The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.
Found this letter from MARKS - MOM - I don't think he'll mind me sharing it with everyone:
Dear Marks,
I am writing this slow because I know that you can't read fast.
We don't live where we did when you left home.
Your dad read in the paper that most accidents happen within 20 miles from your home so we moved.
I won't be able to send you the address, as the last family that lived here took the house numbers when they left so that they wouldn't have to change their address.
This place is real nice. It even has a washing machine. I'm not sure if it works too well though.
Last week I put a load in, pulled the chain, and haven't seen them since.
The weather isn't too bad here., it only rained twice last week, The first time it rained for three days and the second time for four days. The coat you wanted me to send you, your Uncle Steveo51 said it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail with the buttons on, so we cut them off and put them in the pockets. We got another bill from the funeral home.
They said if we don't make the last payment on Grandma's grave, up she comes. Jstop locked his keys in the car yesterday. We were worried because it took him two hours to get me and MAC out.
Your sister had a baby this morning but I haven't found out what it is yet, so I don't know if you're an aunt or an uncle. If the baby is a girl, your sister is going to name it after me, she's going to call it Mom.
Uncle Pizza fell in a whiskey vat last week. Some man tried to pull him out but he fought them off and drowned. We had him cremated and he burned for three days.
Three of your friends went off a bridge in a pick-up truck. D-man was driving. He rolled down the window and swam to safety. Your two friends were in the back. They drowned because they couldn't get the tailgate down.
There isn't much more news at this time. Nothing much has happened.
PS, I was going to send you some money but the envelope was already sealed.
Love - Mom
Maybe that is the one MARKS ordered !!
Holy smokes D-man that one looks a little small I ordered the xxxxl model!!!
hhehehehehehe how did I know that was coming!!!
My wife loves granite!!
Nice "J", I'll get you buddy, just wait and see. LOL
d-man
*Detailman wakes up in the hospital, bandaged *
*from head to foot.*
* *
*The doctor comes in and says, "Ah, I see *
*you've regained consciousness. Now, you *
*probably won't remember, but you were in *
*a pile-up on the freeway. You're going to *
*be okay, you'll walk again and everything, *
*but...*
* *
* "Something happened. I'm trying to break *
*this gently, but the fact is, your willy was *
*chopped off in the wreck and we were unable *
*to find it."*
* *
*Detailman groans, but the doctor goes on, *
*"You've got $9000 in insurance compensation*
*coming and we have the technology now to *
*build you a new willy that will work as well *
*as your old one did - better in fact! But the *
*thing* *is, it doesn't come cheap. It's $1000 *
*an inch."*
* *
*Detailman perks up at this.*
* *
*"So," the doctor says, "It's for you to decide *
*how many inches you want. But it's *
*something you'd better discuss with your *
*wife. I mean, if you had a five inch one before, *
*and you decide to go for a nine incher, she *
*might be a bit put out. But if you had a nine *
*inch one before, and you decide only to invest *
*in a five incher this time, she might be *
*disappointed. So it's important that she plays *
*a role in helping you make the decision."*
* *
*Detailman agrees to talk with his wife.*
* *
*The doctor comes back the next day.*
*"So," says the doctor,*
*"have you spoken with your * *wife?"*
* *
*"I have," says Detailman.*
* *
*"And what is the decision?" asks the doctor.*
* *
*"We're getting granite countertops."*
That is a weird way to blow your nose
If past history was all there was to the game, the richest people would be librarians
Now now folks......LOL
That is a true story!!
Ever been to Marks house! LOL
Such a sad story
The Trucker
A trucker who has been out on the road for three weeks stops into a brothel outside Vegas.
He walks straight up to the Madam, drops down $500 and says, I want your ugliest woman and a bologna sandwich!!
The Madam is astonished. 'But sir, for that kind of money you could have one of my finest ladies and a three-course meal.
The trucker replies, 'Listen sweetheart, I ain't horny . . . . .. . I'm homesick
Just read this post - pretty funny chit- I'm takin my wife to the mall this weekend!!!
LOL It seems to have gone missing
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If you break the rules,
This could be you !!
If you get into trouble
We’d like to help you out. Which way did you come in?
Come on where are
the dam cups?
Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference.
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