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MASSIVE FRAUD (PINKY: MSSSD) ENTERS TRILLION DOLLAR MEDICAL MARIJUANA MARKET
-------Will Create PrintForge 3D Printer Marijuana Farm, Patent Pending
Massive Fraud’s PrintForge 3D Unit is pleased to announce its Fritz the Cat branded Medical Marijuana Division. “3D was yesterday; medical marijuana is today,” observed CEO Emeritus Oscar Hanes. “Did you see the price action on MJNA yesterday – up nearly 50% on news that included that they recognized payment of worthless stock as 5 million dollars of revenue?”
But we have the incredible opportunity to merge the hottest button on the Big Board with the red hot buzz word in penny land!!!" quipped Hanes.
"Yo, Dude, growing ganja IS so yesterday... Why grow da weed and put up with all that hassle when you can just print da sh*t with Massive's phantom 3D printers!!" shouted an excited Fritz the Cat.
“Beginning today, we are canceling all pre-orders for our PrintForge 3D printers and instead will use those printers to create the world’s first 3D printer marijuana farm, for which we have submitted US patent #HQ9470037," remarked Hanes.
“I know that our shareholders were looking forward to seeing revenues finally recognized in our next 10-K and might be disappointed, but I’m sure that they will understand that utilizing our revolutionary PrintForge 3D printers to produce our patent pending Fritz the Cat branded Medical Marijuana will produce a far greater ROI down the road.”
“Along with our Felix the Cat Magic Bag, we anticipate a trillion dollar valuation for this medical marijuana patent. Furthermore, we foresee a trillion dollar market for our Fritz the Cat Medical Marijuana.
About Fritz the Cat
Fritz the Cat is a comic strip created by Robert Crumb. Set in a "supercity" of anthropomorphic animals, the strip focuses on Fritz, a feline con artist who frequently goes on wild adventures that sometimes involve sexual escapades. Crumb began drawing this character in homemade comic books when he was a child. Fritz became his most famous character.
The strip appeared in Help! and Cavalier magazines. It subsequently gained prominence in publications associated with the underground comix scene between 1965 and 1972. Fritz the Cat comic compilations elevated the strip into one of the most iconic features of the underground scene.
The strip received further attention when it was adapted into a 1972 animated film with the same name. The directorial debut of animator Ralph Bakshi, it became a worldwide success. It was the first animated feature film to receive an X rating in the United States and the most successful independent animated feature to date.
MASSIVE FRAUD ENTERS TRILLION DOLLAR MAGIC BAG MARKET
MASSIVE FRAUD (Pinky: MSSSD) SIGNS FRITZ THE CAT
Let's play PhotoShop:
Is it really an iPhone or iPad??? Does the TeliPad really exist???
At least the woman really exists, although the Apple device clearly doesn't!!!
iStockPhoto
And she is as breath-taking as the Telipad sales data...
iStockPhoto
MASSIVE FRAUD (PINKY: MSSSD) INKS AGREEMENT WITH MCDONALDS (MCD)
Responding to multiple pleas of iHub poster and dedicated investor E-Cho20 for Telipad sales data, Massive Fraud (MSSSD) is pleased to report an arrangement with the McDonald's Corporation to use their iconic signage to announce sales milestones of the revolutionary TeliPad!
"We realize that the SEC frowns upon fraudulent 10-Q and 10-K filings and even misleading press releases, so we are excited to resurrect McD's golden arches to fabricate sales numbers of our non-existent TeliPad" commented Oscar Hanes, CEO Emeritus of Massive Fraud.
And this is not the first time the Hanes family crossed paths with the McDonald's Corporation. Hanes confided: "When I was just 5 years old, my Momma advised Ray Kroc, founder of McDonalds, by saying "If you could only find a way of selling hamburgers faster than my boy Oscar can tell lies, you will have the most successful company in the restaurant industry!"
And the rest is history...
In 1917, 15-year-old Ray Kroc lied about his age to join the Red Cross as an ambulance driver, but the war ended before his training finished.
Ray Kroc wanted to build a restaurant system that would be famous for food of consistently high quality and uniform methods of preparation. He wanted to serve burgers, buns, fries and beverages that tasted just the same in Alaska as they did in Alabama.
About McDonald's
McDonald's USA, LLC, is the leading foodservice provider in the United States offering a variety of wholesome foods made from quality ingredients to more than 26 million customers every day. Nearly 90 percent of McDonald's 14,000 U.S. restaurants are independently owned and operated by local businessmen and women. Customers can now log online for free at any of the 11,500 participating Wi-Fi enabled McDonald's U.S. restaurants. For more information, visit www.mcdonalds.com, or follow us on Twitter (@McDonalds) and Facebook (Facebook.com/McDonalds) for updates on our business, promotions and menu items.
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MASSIVE FRAUD (Pinky: MSSSD) SIGNS FRITZ THE CAT TO EXCLUSIVE MULTI-MILLION DOLLAR CONTRACT
Oscar Hanes, CEO Emeritus, is pleased to announce the signing of Fritz the Cat to an exclusive partnership with the PrintForge 3D division of Massive Fraud Inc.
"Our partnership with Felix the Cat has been such an unprecedented success that we felt an urgency to lock in contracts with all Iconic Cartoon Cats," stated Mr. Hanes.
"To date we have close to one billion pre-orders for 3D templates to print realistic articulated hard plastic figurines of the iconic beloved feline classic character, Felix the Cat, on PrintForge 3D home printers which currently has had 3 million units pre-ordered and is backlogged another 20 million units.
"We know all children, especially young girls, love to cuddle with hard plastic action dolls, especially those idolized by their grandparents," observed Hanes.
"And because of his (hint hint) edgy reputation, we already have in mind other lucrative markets worth investigating!!!", hinted a secretive Hanes.
Fritz the Cat is even MORE popular in the UK sitting at #56 on the Channel 4 top 100 all-time Cartoon list ahead of Felix’s #89. “I’m humbled to even be mentioned in the same breath as Fritz!”, bubbled Massive’s spokescat, Felix. "I look forward to working with him!"
“We’re just getting started cornering the Iconic Cat market,” confided Hanes. “We still need to sign Top Cat, Josie and the Pussycats, Stimpy J. Cat, Sylvester J. Pussycat, Sr., Bill the Cat, and Thomas ‘Tom’ Cat.”
Fritz the Cat is a comic strip created by Robert Crumb. Set in a "supercity" of anthropomorphic animals, the strip focuses on Fritz, a feline con artist who frequently goes on wild adventures that sometimes involve sexual escapades. Crumb began drawing this character in homemade comic books when he was a child. Fritz became his most famous character.
The strip appeared in Help! and Cavalier magazines. It subsequently gained prominence in publications associated with the underground comix scene between 1965 and 1972. Fritz the Cat comic compilations elevated the strip into one of the most iconic features of the underground scene.
The strip received further attention when it was adapted into a 1972 animated film with the same name. The directorial debut of animator Ralph Bakshi, it became a worldwide success. It was the first animated feature film to receive an X rating in the United States and the most successful independent animated feature to date.
My soul is tormented! I've been up and down the four corners of this big old world! I've seen it all! I've done it all! I've fought many a good man, and laid many a good woman! I've had riches and fame and adventure...I've tasted life to the fullest, and still my heart cries out, yes, cries out in this hungry, tortured, wrecked quest: 'MORE!'
--- Fritz the Cat
MEET OSCAR HINES,
separated at birth???
You be the judge...
Oscar Hines, CEO Emeritus
Oscar Hines from Georgia
(PS: I think they are different Oscar Hines, but the resemblance is uncanny, methinks.)
MASSIVE FRAUD (PINKY: MSSSD) ANNOUNCES BILLION DOLLAR JOINT VENTURE WITH SECRET INVESTOR
Oscar Hanes, past CEO Emeritus, today reveals billion dollar financing today from a secret source. "We are thrilled to announce affirmation of our REAL VIEW 3D technology with billion dollar financing from a powerful foreign nation which we are not at liberty to reveal at this time!" remarked Hanes.
"I'm looking forward to collaborating with my feline comrades, er friends, abroad", enthused Real View 3D spokescat, Felix the Cat.
Real-View 3D’s capture technology is currently being utilized in its 360° 3D Desktop Scanner, a consumer level scanning system which produces highly detailed 3D imaging designed for e-commerce applications. 3D scanning systems are the next logical step in the additive manufacturing revolution and are a necessary component in the continued proliferation of 3D printers. Real View 3D has been developing a suite of 3D capture technologies and is poised to take advantage of the rapidly emerging 3D marketplace.
MEET OSCAR HINES, HAIR EXPERT
Hello my name is Oscar Hines. Nearly 20 years ago my partner and I undertook a mission: How could we create a product that really controlled hair breakage? Like many of you reading these words we were tired of products claiming to stop breakage but falling way short of that promise. Both of us were trained in Tricology we understand the hair structure and what can damage it as well as what can make it healthy.
We researched everything on the market, but soon realized that all the so called "moisturizing" products being sold contain common ingredients, Petroleum, Glycerin / Glyceral Sterates (Particles of Plastic), Mineral Oils and other forms of greases that simply could not penetrate hair. These ingredients have not changed in nearly a century. We knew there had to be a better way.
After extensive research we developed the SEBA Capsules. A totally unique product that penetrates inside hair, rather than staying on the surface. SEBA works differently than other oils because of its low molecular weight it can actually get inside of hair to provide moisture internally where it counts. The internal moisture SEBA provides helps the hair to defend against the ravages of chemicals, heat, and medications that can cause hair dryness and breakage. We invite you to try SEBA and learn for yourself what so many of our loyal clients already know, SEBA gets results!
As is the case with many successful products cheaper imitations have come along, even using the SEBA name and distributing a lesser quality product through an African Distributor located in the Houston area. So how do you know if your getting the Original SEBA, simple look on the label if it doesn't have our website www.hairhealth.com, its a fake. For those who use the Original SEBA the difference is clear, no smell, and it penetrates into hair immediately. I want to personally thank you for using the Original SEBA Products and welcome your questions so that we can assist you in getting your hair healthy.
MASSIVE DYNAMICS PRESIDENT ATTENDS TOMORROW’S “INSIDE 3D PRINTING EXPO SESSIONS”
Massive Fraud Inc. (OTCQB: MSSSD) has confirmed that President Oscar Hanes attended today’s session of the Inside 3D Printing Expo in New York City, the first of its kind to fully focus on 3D Printing. Hanes where he had the opportunity to interact with new technologies, immerse himself in seminars and meet industry experts – all inspiring the future of Massive Fraud.
He was joined by Jonathan J. Jay, next CEO and founder and president of the Dead-View 3D division. Company spokesperson Felix the Cat, also trekked to the Big Apple.
Not only did Mr. Hanes attend every lecture and break-out session today, but he attended all of tomorrow’s sessions in advance as well!!
“Because of the buzz and excitement surrounding our new Felix the Cat Magic Bag, I felt a duty to our shareholders to morph myself into two people and do tomorrow’s work today as well", enthused Hanes. I need to return tonight to hq at the technology hub of Cupertino so I can focus on our new TRILLION DOLLAR product!"
"I owe it to our shareholders", Hanes reiterated once more.
“We just announced our revolutionary Magic Bag forty minutes ago and already we have over 1 billion pre-orders, a first in any retail business!!!”
Inside 3D Printing boasts a lineup of influential individuals in the additive manufacturing arena, including keynote speaker Terry Wohlers, President at Wohlers Associates Inc.. The conference also features an expo hall filled with industry leaders such as 3D Systems Corporation (NYSE: DDD), Stratasys Ltd. (NASDAQ: SSYS) and MakerBot. Inside 3D Printing plans to explore the present and future impact that this industry will have and Massive Fraud is proud to be a part of shaping that future.
As Echo mentioned, their website has implied that they have sold at least 100,000 Telipads, and I think they are priced at $90 each. I would at least wait until the next 10-Q to see.
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