Fidelity SPDR Advertisement
Home > Boards > The Lounge > Humor/Jokes >

Any Good Jokes? (JOKES)

JOKES RSS Feed
      Hide Sticky   Hide Intro
Moderator: PappaJohn Assistants:
Search This Board:
Last Post: 9/17/2014 11:51:44 PM - Followers: 544 - Board type: Premium - Posts Today: 0

Post your best ones here...


Please, not too blue. Remember, our children may be reading these, too. And language...what is "adult language?"...if it is wrong, it is wrong.

Politics are a cause of concern for many who come here to escape the antics of the political playground on the Potomac. As such, politicals should be posted on boards specializing in politics: http://www.investorshub.com/boards/boards.asp?cat_id=123 "The trouble with political jokes is that very often they get elected."~Will Rogers We've the right to Freedom of Speech, but with rights comes responsibilities. Please be responsible by choosing the right forum / board for politics. JOKES is for laughs, not political propagandizing, please. The main criterion for politically out-of-bounds is (but not necessarily limited to): Jokes in which a candidate or political party is the butt of the joke is off-topic and subject to removal. It may be funny as all get-out, but alas, this isn't a campaign thread and IHub has boards specializing in politics and some anything-goes boards. JOKES is for laughs for the masses and humor for all who bless us with their presence.

Not only jokes, but if you have something uplifting that may lighten the load or brighten the day, feel free to post it.

Have something ironic or thought provoking?

Thank you for stopping by.




DISCLAIMER: The humor contained within does not reflect the thoughts or opinions of either myself, my company, my friends, or my wombat; don't quote me on that; don't quote me on anything; all rights reserved; this joke is distribution copyrighted to the extent that you may distribute these jokes and all its associated parts freely but you may not make a profit from it or include the joke in commercial publications without written permission from Major League Baseball; other copyright laws for specific jokes apply wherever noted; jokes are subject to change without notice; jokes are slightly enlarged to show detail; any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is unintentional and purely coincidental; hand wash only, tumble dry on low heat; do not bend, fold, mutilate, or spindle; your mileage may vary; no substitutions allowed; for a limited time only; this humor offer is void where prohibited, taxed, or otherwise restricted; humor is provided "as is" without any warranties expressed or implied; user assumes full liabilities; not liable for damages due to use or misuse; an equal opportunity joke employer; no shoes, no shirt, no jokes; quantities are limited while supplies last; if defects are discovered, do not attempt to fix them yourself, but return to an authorized joke service center; caveat emptor; read at your own risk; parental advisory - explicit lyrics; text may contain material some readers may find objectionable, parental guidance is advised; keep away from sunlight, pets, and small children; limit one-per-family please; no money down; no purchase necessary; you need not be present to win; some assembly required; batteries are not included; action figures sold separately; no preservatives added; Best viewed at 1024 x 768 pixels, safety goggles may be required during use; sealed for your protection, do not use if the safety seal is broken; call before you dig; for external use only; if a rash, redness, irritation,or swelling develops, discontinue use; use only with proper ventilation; avoid extreme temperatures and store in a cool dry place; keep away from open flames and avoid inhaling fumes; avoid contact with mucous membranes;do not puncture, incinerate, or store above 120 degrees Fahrenheit; do not place near flammable or magnetic source; smoking these jokes may be hazardous to your health; the best safeguard, second only to abstinence, is the use of a good laugh; text used in these jokes is made from 100% recycled electrons and magnetic particles; no animals were used to test the hilarity of these jokes; no salt, MSG, artificial color or flavour added; if ingested, do not induce vomiting, if symptoms persist, consult a humorologist; jokes are ribbed for your pleasure; slippery when wet; must be 18 to enter; possible penalties for early withdrawal; joke offer valid only at participating E-mail sites; slightly higher west of the Rockies; allow four to six weeks for delivery; disclaimer does not cover hurricane, lightning, tornado, tsunami, volcanic eruption, earthquake, flood, and other Acts of God, misuse, neglect, unauthorized repair, damage from improper installation, broken antenna or marred cabinet, incorrect line voltage, missing or altered serial numbers, sonic boom vibrations, electromagnetic radiation from nuclear blasts, customer adjustments that are not covered in the joke list, and incidents owing to airplane crash, ship sinking, motor vehicle accidents, leaky roof, broken glass, falling rocks, mud slides, forest fire, flying projectiles, or dropping the item; other restrictions may apply. Keep away from water and small children. If something offends you, lighten up, get a life, and move on.

PostSubject
#20316   Just got a Cheerio stuck between my toes SHORENUFFSTUFF 09/17/14 11:51:44 PM
#20315   The big game hunter walked in the bar SHORENUFFSTUFF 09/17/14 11:47:40 PM
#20314   Three old men went into the pro shop excel 09/17/14 06:33:51 PM
#20313   Wow .... I wouldn't mind going shopping if Gmenfan 09/17/14 06:25:25 AM
#20312   Lol! Like a raunchy Far Side! pos_stock_hoarder 09/16/14 09:53:43 PM
#20311   images.investorshub.advfn.com/images/uploads/2014/9/16/hxjfzBoob_Pit.JPG[ Flobewan 09/16/14 07:42:36 PM
#20310   Sally Mullihan of Coral Springs, Florida decided to e-ore 09/16/14 03:16:35 PM
#20309   A ragged, old, derelict shuffled into a down Gmenfan 09/16/14 10:07:22 AM
#20308   A man is sent to prison for the SHORENUFFSTUFF 09/15/14 08:38:49 PM
#20307   The thing about Workaholics Anonymous is... SHORENUFFSTUFF 09/15/14 08:35:57 PM
#20306   The Mortician's Big Discovery SHORENUFFSTUFF 09/15/14 08:24:22 PM
#20305   Everyone’s Freaking Out Over This Colombian Women Team’s crudeoil24 09/15/14 05:18:09 PM
#20304   Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. SHORENUFFSTUFF 09/15/14 11:11:44 AM
#20303   i14.photobucket.com/albums/a324/mnfats/football_zps3cb85c0e.jpg mnfats 09/13/14 04:14:19 PM
#20302   A little boy was in a cemetery with mnfats 09/13/14 03:58:57 PM
#20301   A police officer was interviewing a young recruit. mnfats 09/13/14 03:24:14 PM
#20300   That's a gem! I loved the story pos_stock_hoarder 09/13/14 01:09:03 PM
#20299   I think you'll enjoy this one. I bet excel 09/12/14 10:35:06 PM
#20298   That clip was so funny. From what pos_stock_hoarder 09/12/14 09:46:23 PM
#20297   Can't you see I'm eating Frank. LOLOLOL!!!! excel 09/12/14 08:01:33 PM
#20296   I'm getting to the stage in my life Gmenfan 09/12/14 05:35:42 PM
#20295   Two flies land on a pile of crap. SHORENUFFSTUFF 09/12/14 03:07:38 PM
#20294   A very elderly gentleman, (mid nineties) SHORENUFFSTUFF 09/12/14 02:57:36 PM
#20293   Don Rickles and Frank Sinatra on Carson (1975) pos_stock_hoarder 09/12/14 10:07:48 AM
#20292   Spanish Delicacy Newhampsha 09/12/14 07:33:10 AM
#20291   More Republican Lies!!!!!!!! Or not?? You Newhampsha 09/11/14 12:25:18 PM
#20290   Three couples want to joint the Catholic Church. SHORENUFFSTUFF 09/11/14 11:54:03 AM
#20289   Not once did Mrs. Burnfart ever fart in SHORENUFFSTUFF 09/11/14 11:52:01 AM
#20288   Some people say America is obese, SHORENUFFSTUFF 09/11/14 11:43:13 AM
#20287   Never saw that 60 Minutes clip. Thanks pos_stock_hoarder 09/10/14 11:08:16 PM
#20286   The old bitch loved it!!!!!!!!!!!!! Newhampsha 09/10/14 04:01:13 PM
#20285   A man returned home from the night shift SHORENUFFSTUFF 09/10/14 03:13:04 PM
#20284   A young Chinese couple gets married. Shes a SHORENUFFSTUFF 09/10/14 03:11:44 PM
#20283   The strong young man at the construction site SHORENUFFSTUFF 09/10/14 03:10:25 PM
#20282   Seen first link a few times. Use to excel 09/10/14 01:47:32 PM
#20281   Both of them together: Gmenfan 09/10/14 01:27:15 PM
#20280   AMEN! I use to be into comedy long a excel 09/10/14 01:10:17 PM
#20279   The next time there's an awkward silence, SHORENUFFSTUFF 09/10/14 11:32:43 AM
#20278   Whether you are a fan or not, you'll pos_stock_hoarder 09/10/14 10:00:38 AM
#20277   Don't ya just hate it???!! Gmenfan 09/09/14 05:28:53 PM
#20276   OMG, how true Flobewan 09/09/14 05:20:48 PM
#20275   i14.photobucket.com/albums/a324/mnfats/english_zps67f574c6.jpg mnfats 09/09/14 05:10:14 PM
#20274   how to get a raise SHORENUFFSTUFF 09/09/14 03:22:30 PM
#20273   A wise man once said... SHORENUFFSTUFF 09/09/14 03:21:42 PM
#20272   ...if a chicken coop has more than two doors,.... backtrax 09/08/14 02:51:55 PM
#20271   Don't ask me where I've been all your SHORENUFFSTUFF 09/08/14 02:26:15 PM
#20270   It was the end of the day when excel 09/08/14 01:31:27 PM
#20269   Arrrrr....tis a powerfully bad groaner....beware! pos_stock_hoarder 09/07/14 10:58:46 AM
#20268   Top 10 reasons to come to work naked SHORENUFFSTUFF 09/06/14 01:23:28 PM
#20267   4-15-99 SHORENUFFSTUFF 09/06/14 10:57:35 AM
PostSubject