When I was at New York Law School in '92-'93, I had an ancient Professor, probably in his 80s or 90s at the time, who looked like Emperor Palpatine, named Professor Lee. He was probably my closest encounter with John Houseman in the Paper Chase. That was also when Pearl Jam's "Jeremy" was in heavy rotation on MTV and alt-rock radio. I entertained the students by singing:
"King Professor Lee the wicked, ruled our world, Professor Lee croaked in class today-ay, Professor Lee croaked in, Professor Lee croaked in, class today-ay"
In First Year, I had another Professor with an ultra-heavy New Zealand accent, and a beard but no mustache. His nickname among the inmates was "Weird Beard". Well one day Weird Beard called on me sitting back row aisle (back row to protect my flank, aisle to make a quick escape), and asked me what are my views on some case called "Walker"?
With a straight deadpan look I shot back, "Johnny Red or Johnny Black?" Picture like a Pacific Tsunami, a windowless room full of 60-70 sleepy-eyed first year law students erupted in laughter that shook the room.
In Family Law, I had a Professor Newman who had lazy eye and thick coke bottle glasses. I noticed that because of his lazy eye, he would have to turret his head to call on students on the left side of the lecture hall.
Ever the strategist, I again sat back row left aisle, because I noticed that when Professor Newman would turret with his lazy eye like the 16-inch guns on the USS Missouri, he could only turret so far before turreting back. Needless to say, I was never called on because I was out of range of his lazy eye.
Incidentally, throughout middle school and high school, whenever one of our worksheets would ask "If so, why?", instead of "Why or why not?", I would answer "No", in order to avoid doing the work. Yet here I am.
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