T'WAS THE NIGHT

(The following is an email received this veterans day)

T'WAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS,
HE LIVED ALL ALONE,
IN A ONE BEDROOM HOUSE
MADE OF PLASTER AND STONE.

I HAD COME DOWN THE CHIMNEY
WITH PRESENTS TO GIVE,
AND TO SEE JUST WHO
IN THIS HOME DID LIVE.

I LOOKED ALL ABOUT,
A STRANGE SIGHT I DID SEE,
NO TINSEL, NO PRESENTS,
NOT EVEN A TREE.

NO STOCKING BY MANTLE,
JUST BOOTS FILLED WITH SAND,
ON THE WALL HUNG PICTURES
OF FAR DISTANT LANDS.

WITH MEDALS AND BADGES,
AWARDS OF ALL KINDS,
A SOBER THOUGHT
CAME THROUGH MY MIND.

FOR THIS HOUSE WAS DIFFERENT,
IT WAS DARK AND DREARY,
I FOUND THE HOME OF A SOLDIER,
ONCE I COULD SEE CLEARLY.

THE SOLDIER LAY SLEEPING,
SILENT, ALONE,
CURLED UP ON THE FLOOR
IN THIS ONE BEDROOM HOME.

THE FACE WAS SO GENTLE,
THE ROOM IN SUCH DISORDER,
NOT HOW I PICTURED
A UNITED STATES SOLDIER.

WAS THIS THE HERO
OF WHOM I'D JUST READ?
CURLED UP ON A PONCHO,
THE FLOOR FOR A BED?

I REALIZED THE FAMILIES
THAT I SAW THIS NIGHT,
OWED THEIR LIVES TO THESE SOLDIERS
WHO WERE WILLING TO FIGHT.

SOON ROUND THE WORLD,
THE CHILDREN WOULD PLAY,
AND GROWNUPS WOULD CELEBRATE
A BRIGHT CHRISTMAS DAY.

THEY ALL ENJOYED FREEDOM
EACH MONTH OF THE YEAR,
BECAUSE OF THE SOLDIERS,
LIKE THE ONE LYING HERE.

I COULDN'T HELP WONDER
HOW MANY LAY ALONE,
ON A COLD CHRISTMAS EVE
IN A LAND FAR FROM HOME.

THE VERY THOUGHT
BROUGHT A TEAR TO MY EYE,
I DROPPED TO MY KNEES
AND STARTED TO CRY.

THE SOLDIER AWAKENED
AND I HEARD A ROUGH VOICE,
"SANTA DON'T CRY,
THIS LIFE IS MY CHOICE,

I FIGHT FOR FREEDOM,
I DON'T ASK FOR MORE,
MY LIFE IS MY GOD,
MY COUNTRY, MY CORPS."

THE SOLDIER ROLLED OVER
AND SOON DRIFTED TO SLEEP,
I COULDN'T CONTROL IT,
I CONTINUED TO WEEP.

I KEPT WATCH FOR HOURS,
SO SILENT AND STILL
AND WE BOTH SHIVERED
FROM THE COLD NIGHT'S CHILL.

I DIDN'T WANT TO LEAVE
ON THAT COLD, DARK, NIGHT,
THIS GUARDIAN OF HONOR
SO WILLING TO FIGHT.

THEN THE SOLDIER ROLLED OVER,
WITH A VOICE SOFT AND PURE,
WHISPERED, "CARRY ON SANTA,
IT'S CHRISTMAS DAY, ALL IS SECURE."

ONE LOOK AT MY WATCH,
AND I KNEW HE WAS RIGHT.
"MERRY CHRISTMAS MY FRIEND,
AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT."

This poem was written by a Marine stationed in Okinawa Japan. The following is his request. I think it is reasonable.....PLEASE. Would you do me the kind favor of sending this to as many people as you can?
Christmas will be coming soon and somecredit is due to our U.S. service men and women for our being able to celebrate these festivities. Let's try in this small way to pay a tiny bit of what we owe. Make people stop and think of our heroes, living and dead, who sacrificed themselves for us. Please, do your small part to plant this small seed.

(end of email)

NetCurrents Inc. Announces Earnings Conference Call
BURLINGAME, Calif.--(BUSINESS WIRE)--Nov.10. 2000--NetCurrents Inc. (Nasdaq:NTCS - news), The Premier Internet Intelligence Agency, Friday announced that it has scheduled an earnings conference call on Tuesday, Nov. 14, 2000 at 4:15 p.m. Eastern Time, to discuss third quarter 2000 financial results and the current state of operations.

The results will be released before the market opens on Tuesday, Nov. 14, 2000.

You may participate in the conference call by telephone by calling 888/209-3777 and referencing the NetCurrents conference call. The company will also provide an online, real-time Webcast of its 2000 third quarter financial release conference call.

The live broadcast of NetCurrents' quarterly conference call will be available on (www.Vcall.com) on Nov. 14, 2000, beginning at 4:15 p.m. EST. The online archive will be available immediately and continue through Nov. 28, 2000.

About NetCurrents Inc.

NetCurrents, The Premier Internet Intelligence Agency, monitors and analyzes communications from the Internet in real-time. The company provides clients with critical information and counsel to protect their corporate image, measure consumers' perceptions, and counter misinformation on the Internet.

Due to the sensitivity of businesses that require this type of technology and analysis, the confidentiality of NetCurrents' clients is assured.

For more information about NetCurrents products and services, contact the company at 650/401-3200 and for information about the company, visit its Web site at www.netcurrents.com


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Contact:

Allen & Caron Inc.
Matt Clawson (investors), 949/474-4300
matt@allencaron.com


http://biz.yahoo.com/bw/001110/ca_netcurr.html

a few things to think about



Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.
_______________________________________________
I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain.
_______________________________________________
I am in shape. Round's a shape...
_______________________________________________
I'm desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets.
_______________________________________________
Ever wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?
_______________________________________________
I always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific.
_______________________________________________
Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at you?
But when you take him in a car he sticks his head out the window.
_______________________________________________
Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac.
_______________________________________________
You have to stay in shape. My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60.
She's 97 today and we don't know where she is.
_______________________________________________
The reason most people play golf is to wear clothes they would not be caught dead in otherwise.
_______________________________________________
I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three.
_______________________________________________
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness.
Think of your three best friends. If they are okay, then it's you..
_______________________________________________
Now they show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there. I think if you've got a T-shirt with a bloodstain all over it, maybe laundry isn't your biggest problem.
Maybe you should get rid of the body before you do the wash.
_______________________________________________
I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful animal.
There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I only have photographs of her.
_______________________________________________
A lady came up to me on the street and pointed at my suede jacket. 'You know a cow was murdered for that jacket'? She sneered. I replied in a psychotic tone, 'I didn't know there were any witnesses. Now I'll have to kill you too.' _______________________________________________
Future historians will be able to study at the Gerald Ford Library; the James Carter Library; the Ronald Reagan Library and the Bill Clinton Adult Bookstore.

Only in America

Only in America... Can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

Only in America... Are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

Only in America... Do people order double cheese burgers, a large fry, and a diet coke.

Only in America... Do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

Only in America... Do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and leave useless things and junk in boxes in the garage.

Only in America... Do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

Only in America... Do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

Only in America... Do we use the word "politics" to describe the process so well: "poli" in latin meaning "many," and "tics" meaning "blood-sucking creatures."

And in America a school teacher can get fired for having a Bible on her desk.

Only in America do we have several unread Bibles in our home, while most of the rest of the world is begging for just one copy.

Only in America do I offend people by wishing them a Merry Christmas

How Oracle Avoided Getting Emulexed

Editor: Luciano Siracusano (11/3/00)

One of the more interesting stories from Thursday's trading involved the washing and rinsing of Oracle (NASDAQ: ORCL - Quotes, News, Boards).
Oracle's stock came under attack when rumors circulated that the company was heading for some operating headaches and that senior executives of the software maker may soon be resigning.

At 11:12 Eastern Time on Thursday morning, with the stock already down $1.56 on heavy volume, Briefing.com, a provider of market commentary, reported on its Web site that Oracle was "in play." Briefing.com, which is in touch with Wall Street trading desks in real time, reported that rumors were spreading about both the health of its applications software business and the possibility that Oracle's chief financial officer, Jeff Henley, would soon resign.

At 11:18 a.m., similar musings surfaced at theflyonthewall.com, another subscription-based source of trading "buzz" on the Internet.

Once the cable networks reported the unusual activity in Oracle's stock to television audiences, additional rumors quickly ricocheted across heavily trafficked message boards throughout cyberspace. Oracle's stock, which opened at $32.44, was in freefall by 11:30 a.m., falling nearly 16% to $27.25.

While Wall Street trading desks were vibrating, on the other side of the country a small team of Internet intelligence analysts at NetCurrents (NASDAQ: NTCS - Quotes, News, Boards), a small Los Angeles-based concern, were huddling, deciphering data supplied to them by revolutionary software that scours the Internet in real time for information about particular companies.

NetCurrents owns this proprietary software and uses it to see who is trash-talking its clients on message boards and Web sites around the world. It does this as a premium service for its customers. NetCurrents also has an exclusive alliance with Kroll Risk Consulting Services, a division of Kroll-O'Gara (NASDAQ: KROG - Quotes, News, Boards), a company that conducts investigations for multinational corporations.

Oracle is one of NetCurrents' clients.

Within two minutes after the second post appeared on theflyonthewall.com, NetCurrents alerted Oracle about the specific content of the rumor. Oracle then moved quickly to nip the bad information in the bud.

Messages were quickly relayed to the trading desks at Morgan Stanley Dean Witter and Goldman Sachs that the resignation rumors were not true.

Briefing.com, which had been in contact with the trading desks, soon thereafter reported that denial on its site at 12:09 p.m., with Oracle's stock trading at around $29.

At the same time, Oracle's press office was quelling rumors by speaking to reporters directly.

And at 12:36 p.m., a Reuters news service story appeared on the Internet, quoting company spokespersons saying that the rumors about executive resignations were categorically false.

The stock stabilized and recovered later in the day from the depressed morning levels.

Friday, analysts were defending the stock. Lehman Brothers said the sell-off provoked by the rumors had created a buying opportunity in Oracle's shares.

NetCurrents, which is due to report quarterly results next week, sees a large market opportunity for its technology, as companies come to grips with the reality that information published on the Internet can have deleterious consequences for their products, corporate reputations and stock prices.

NetCurrents is expanding its customer base and intends to target the legal community as well. Both class-action lawyers and legal firms defending clients from such suits have use for NetCurrents' solutions.

Although the company is still in its infancy, its business model shows promise, especially if management succeeds in transforming the company into a software concern that can generate 65% to 70% gross margins, fueled by recurring revenue streams from global partners.

According to NetCurrents, it was actually talking to Emulex (NASDAQ: EMLX - Quotes, News, Boards) shortly before the infamous "Emulex stock hoax" rocked that high-tech company. Those discussions alone, however, were not enough to save that high-flying stock from gyrating to the whims of an allegedly heavily leveraged student.

Going forward, companies may realize that NetCurrents offers the best protection against getting "Emulexed" in the future.

Bottom Line:

At a recent price of $1, NetCurrents shares are way off their 52-week high. Although we continue to believe that this equity is best suited for speculative accounts, we suggest investors take a fresh look at the company's progress after it reports in November.


http://www.individualinvestor.com

FrogBlender


http://www.joecartoon.com/reddot/blender.html

Takes a short while to load with a dial-up connection, but is kinda cute. Can be downloaded and emailed as an executable attachment.

This about MONEY . . .

It can buy a House - But not a Home

It can buy a Bed - But not Sleep

It can buy a Clock - But not Time

It can buy you a Book - But not Knowledge

It can buy you a Position - But not Respect

It can buy you Medicine - But not Health

It can buy you Blood - But not Life

It can buy you Sex - But not Love


So you see money isn't everything.

I tell you all this because I am your Friend, and as your Friend, I want to take away your pain and suffering....
So send me all your money and I will suffer for you.
A truer Friend than me you will never find.

CASH ONLY, PLEASE!!!

Environmental Solutions Worldwide CEO Mark Nicole To Be Interviewed On 'Before The Bell' Radio Program
MARKHAM, Ontario--(BUSINESS WIRE)--Nov. 1, 2000--Environmental Solutions Worldwide, Inc. (OTCBB:ESWW - news), the developer of a high-performance environmentally friendly catalytic converter and spark plug technology, announced today that Chief Executive Officer Mark Nicole will be a guest on the financial radio program ``Before the Bell'' on Thursday, November 2 at 8:30 a.m. EST.

Mr. Nicole will be interviewed by program host and senior financial consultant Mark Crociati. The broadcast from Boston, Massachusetts, can be heard live in the New England area on radio station WBNW at 1120AM on the dial or WPLM-AM at 1390AM. ``Before the Bell'' is heard by more than one million listeners in the Massachusetts area. The live broadcast also can be accessed on the Internet at www.1120wbnw.com.

Environmental Solutions Worldwide, Inc., through its wholly owned BBL Technologies, Inc., subsidiary, is a developer of proprietary catalytic converter technology used in its prototype Enviro Cat(TM) catalytic converter, which is designed to dramatically reduce toxic emissions, including nitrous oxide, expelled by internal combustion engines. The converter requires no precious metals in the manufacturing process, making it less expensive to produce. The Company also has developed a new, highly efficient spark plug with the potential of increasing the efficiency of internal combustion engines, reducing toxic emissions while increasing fuel economy. Environmental Solutions holds Canadian patents and U.S. patent pending on its catalytic converter technology and is in the process of obtaining worldwide patent protection. The Company also holds a U.S. patent for its spark plug technology. For additional information visit the Company's Web site at (www.cleanerfuture.com) or call Mark Nicole, CEO, or David Johnson, COO, at 905-947-9923.

This press release contains forward-looking statements within the meaning of the Private Securities Litigation Reform Act of 1995 (the ``Act'''). In particular, when used in the preceding discussion, the words ``plan,'' ``confident that,'' ``believe,'' ``expect,'' or ``intend to,'' and similar conditional expressions are intended to identify forward-looking statements within the meaning of the Act and are subject to the safe harbor created by the Act. Such statements are subject to certain risks and uncertainties and actual results could differ materially from those expressed in any of the forward-looking statements. Such risks and uncertainties include, but are not limited to, market conditions, general acceptance of the Company's products and technologies, competitive factors, the ability to successfully complete additional financings and other risks described in the Company's SEC reports and filings.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Contact:

Environmental Solutions Worldwide, Inc., Markham
Mark Nicole
Chief Executive Officer
905/947-9923


http://biz.yahoo.com/bw/001101/envir0nmen.html

Subsequent release corrected spelling.

"Worlwide" to "Worldwide"

Environmental Solutions Worlwide, Inc. to Acquire Controlling Interest in Applied Diesel Technology, Inc.
MARKHAM, Ontario--(BUSINESS WIRE)--Oct. 31, 2000--Environmental Solutions Worldwide, Inc. (OTC BB: ESWW - news) announced today that a letter of Intent had been signed to acquire controlling interest of Applied Diesel Technology, Inc. (ADT) and Air Testing Services, Inc. (ATS) of Telford, Pennsylvania. Terms of the acquisition were not disclosed. ADT developed and is manufacturing advanced diesel emission control technologies, including the patented Clean®Cat System. In addition ADT incorporates an Authorised EPA Emissions Contract Laboratory, Air Testing Services Inc. which is one of the selected EPA and California Air Resource Board (CARB) listed laboratories, capable of conducting the full Federal Test Procedure in North America.

ESWW has merged its own Research and Development facilities with those of ADT/ATS. The effect of this is to combine both teams of experienced engineers and technicians, which will accelerate the EPA acceptance of the EnviroCat. In addition ESWW's financial support, with the recently announced private placement, will allow ADT to complete its full EPA authorisation, allowing Clean®Cat to be introduced to the North American and European Markets. ADT currently has sales in Far East markets with further potential sales in Hong Kong, Philippines, Australia and China. With the help of ESWW's recently announced adviser Chase Manhattan Bank, through its Global Automotive Division, ESWW/ADT will facilitate manufacturing and sales of Clean®Cat systems in these countries.

Mark Nicole, CEO stated, ``ESWW and ADT's technologies are highly complementary. The development and manufacturing of both sets of products will be accelerated by combining both companies under one roof in Telford, Pennsylvania.''

ESWW has recruited project manager Jerry Smith from Loomis Products Company and has co-located all equipment and staff with ADT. ESWW will now have access to a full in-house testing facility for all different fuel technologies. As negotiations have swiftly proceeded, there has been minimal delay to the production of the EnviroCat. All our R&D and extrusion equipment has been moved and integrated into the Telford facility over the last 2 weeks.

ESWW's headquarters remains in Toronto. Robert Marino of ADT will join the Board of Directors of ESWW. Mr. Marino brings with him over 20 years of technical expertise in the business of Catalytic converters and EPA emissions testing on all fuel types.

ESWW and ADT have commissioned a study to identify the synergies of their combined technologies, both in the transportation and power industries. ADT currently has applications developed for the Automotive, Truck, Marine, ATV and small engine sectors.

Bengt Odner, Chairman of ESWW commented, ``In addition to creating an immediate revenue stream for ESWW, the combination of technical expertise, products and resources of ADT/ATS and ESWW, provides a unique opportunity for both companies. ADT currently has production and sales of the Clean®Cat System and ESWW can now confidently accelerate the completion of the EnviroCat, enhancing our capabilities with potential JV partners. This is the beginning of further acquisitions by the company in environmental businesses where there are both excellent technologies alongside positive revenue flow.''

For further information on both companies please visit their Web Sites at www.cleanerfuture.com and www.clean-cat.com or contact Mark Nicole, CEO, or David Johnson, COO, at 905/947-9923.

This press release contains forward-looking statements within the meaning of the Private Securities Litigation Reform Act of 1995 (The ``Act''). In particular, when used in the preceding discussion, the words ``plan,'' ``confident that,'' ``believe,'' ``expect,'' or ``intend to,'' and similar conditional expressions are intended to identify forward-looking statements within the meaning of the Act and are subject to the safe harbor created by the Act. Such statements are subject to certain risks and uncertainties and actual results could differ materially from those expressed in any of the forward-looking statements. Such risks and uncertainties include, but are not limited to, market conditions, general acceptance of the Company's products and technologies, competitive factors, the ability to successfully complete additional financings and other risks described in the Company's SEC reports and filings.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Contact:

Environmental Solutions Worlwide,
Mark Nicole, CEO
David Johnson, COO
905/947-9923


http://biz.yahoo.com/bw/001031/environmen.html

Women


There were 11 people hanging onto a rope that came down from a helicopter.
Ten were men and one woman.
They all decided that one person should get off because if they didn't the rope would break and everyone would die.
No one could decide who should go so finally the woman gave a really touching speech saying how she would give up her life to save the others, because women were used to giving up things for their husbands and children, giving in to men, and not receiving anything in return. When she finished speaking, all the men started clapping.

Never underestimate the power of a Woman.

PMXX update, now at $4

Primix On Production Fast Track
ATWOOD, Ind.--(BUSINESS WIRE)--Oct. 27, 2000--The Primix Corporation (NQB Pink Sheets:PMXX), manufacturer of the revolutionary ``Primix Engineered Composite Railroad Tie'', announces the start of production.

Primix has started production of railroad ties to be installed at four facilities including a major Class 1 railroad's main line track, a fortune 500 company's industrial spur line, and a major automotive manufacturers spur line.

Marc Shea, president of Primix Corporation stated, ``We are very happy with the diverse customer base that Primix is developing because it proves that Primix railroad ties are the perfect solution for any railroad tie application across the board.''

In addition, Primix has ramped up the sales process of their revolutionary tie by hiring seasoned sales agents across the country that have extensive experience in the railroad field. By incorporating hard hitting sales agents into the Primix business plan, Primix is gearing up to begin full scare production as soon as orders justify large scale manufacturing.

Primix Corporation has recently hired Sonja Gilman as Chief Financial Officer and is currently interviewing for a Chief Operating Officer that will help take the company into global markets.

This press release contains forward-looking statements within the meaning of The Private Securities Litigation Reform Act of 1995 (the ``Act''). In particular, when used in the preceding discussion, the words ``expect, ''realize,`` ''opportunity,`` and similar conditional expressions are intended to identify forward-looking statements within the meaning of the Act and are subject to the safe harbor created by the Act. Such statements are subject to certain risks and uncertainties and actual results could differ materially from those expressed in any of the forward-looking statements. Investors are cautioned that all forward-looking statements involve risks and uncertainties, including, without limitation, industry acceptance of the Primix composite railroad tie, availability of raw materials, equipment failures, labor disputes, competition, pricing pressures, and other risks detailed from time to time in the company's periodic reports filed with the SEC, other news releases, and publications.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Contact:

Primix Corporation
Marc Shea, 219/858-0069
Web Site: http://www.primixcorp.com/
E Mail Investor Relations: www.primix@primixcorp.com

http://biz.yahoo.com/bw/001027/in_primix.html

Was at $2 on 11 Sep

NetCurrents Names Michael O'Hara as V.P. Product Strategy
Veteran Technology Executive to Oversee Business and Product Development, Technology
BURLINGAME, Calif.--(BUSINESS WIRE)--Oct. 23, 2000--NetCurrents Inc. (Nasdaq:NTCS - news), The Premier Internet Intelligence Agency, Monday announced that proven technology executive Michael J. O'Hara has been named vice president product strategy, effective immediately.

O'Hara will oversee the company's product and business development efforts and all new applications of its proprietary, real time Internet intelligence technologies. He will report directly to chairman and CEO Irwin Meyer.

O'Hara, a long-time executive at El Segundo, Calif.-based Hughes Information Technology Systems and Hughes Space and Communications was most recently senior vice president business development of eSat Inc., working out of its offices in Universal City, Calif.

``Prior to joining us,'' Meyer said, ``Michael consulted with NetCurrents on several key projects including a number of market research and product focused studies on how best to apply our innovative technologies and expand our markets with new products and services.

``He is thoroughly familiar with our technology and is completely up to speed adding significant immediate value to the company. In addition, his commitment to the company's strategy and future has been clearly demonstrated by his purchase of NetCurrents' shares in the open market.''

``Michael's background in Internet technology, business development and communications is exactly the mix of expertise we need to take full advantage of the increasing demand for our services,'' Meyer said.

``He has proven skills in working with large and mid-size corporate clients and has shown the ability to develop and manage strategic relationships like those we currently enjoy with our partners around the U.S. and Canada.''

At eSat, O'Hara developed and negotiated contracts with domestic and international strategic partners, was the lead presenter for all investor and analyst presentations, worked with the CEO of eSat on company re-branding and investor communications and served as chief technology officer.

From 1996 to January 2000, O'Hara was chief systems engineer for Hughes Space and Communications. Among his duties was responsibility for the overall technical effort for a $4 billion polar orbiting environmental satellite system.

He also successfully managed a three-year $5.4 million risk-reduction study for a joint program office of the U.S. Air Force, NOAA and NASA and he worked on a number of critical international programs where he interfaced with and gave technology presentations to officials in Japan and Germany. He also made numerous technology presentations to Hughes customers and users in the United States and internationally.

From 1991 to 1996, O'Hara was with Hughes Information Technology Systems in El Segundo and in Landover, Md., where his last position was a senior systems engineer. While at Hughes he supported a number of new business initiatives to reuse a remote sensing ground data processing system (ECS) developed under an $800 million contract to NASA.

He managed proposal efforts for RFPs involving the reuse of ECS and was one of only four people in a 400-plus person organization authorized to give presentations on ECS to prospective customers. O'Hara worked with potential customers to tailor the functional, interface and performance parameters of ECS to their environment and applications.

His other responsibilities at Hughes included conducting technology assessments of commercial software, including high-level programming languages, Web-based user interfaces, client/server architectures, database management systems and terabyte robotic archive systems.

In 1993, O'Hara independently helped establish Southern California-based CyberScape Inc., an Internet start-up that focused on virtual reality multi-player entertainment. He co-authored the new company's business plan with two others and assisted in establishing software and technology alliances with established companies for the new venture.

He also developed a demonstration prototype of the entertainment concept.

O'Hara began his career at Hughes Aircraft Co. in El Segundo in 1984 as an engineer developing software programs to automate a far-field test antenna test range and to determine signal crosstalk within multi-conductor shielded cable harnesses.

In 1987 he was named study leader and directed and co-authored a comprehensive study that examined state-of-the-art technologies of interest to the Defense Communications Agency. He then rose steadily through the ranks as a communications systems engineer, lead communications systems engineer and software project manager.

O'Hara has a bachelor's degree in physics (magna cum laude) from the University of Massachusetts at Lowell, and master's degrees in physics and computer science from the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign.

About NetCurrents

NetCurrents, The Premier Internet Intelligence Agency, analyzes communications from more than 60,000 targeted Internet locations in real-time. The company provides clients critical information and counsel to protect their corporate image, measure consumers' perceptions and counter misinformation on the Internet.

Due to the sensitivity of businesses that require this type of technology and analysis, the confidentiality of NetCurrents' clients is assured.

For more information about the company and its products and services visit its Web site at www.netcurrents.com.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Contact:

Allen & Caron Inc.
Matt Clawson (investors), 949/474-4300
Matt@allencaron.com
or
Len Hall (media), 949/474-4300
Len@allencaron.com


http://biz.yahoo.com/bw/001023/ca_netcurr.html

Chase Securities Inc. Establishes Relationship with Environmental Solutions Worldwide
MARKHAM, Ontario--(BUSINESS WIRE)--Oct. 18, 2000--Environmental Solutions Worldwide, Inc. (OTC BB:ESWW - news), the developer of new environmental technologies, announced today that it has engaged Chase Securities Inc. to advise and assist the Company on a broad range of strategic alternatives.

Chase Securities Inc. is utilizing its Global Transportation Mergers & Acquisitions Department alongside its Automotive Division based both out of New York and London to facilitate joint ventures, licensing agreements and other transactions with manufacturers around the world.

Environmental Solutions Worldwide, Inc., through its wholly owned BBL Technologies, Inc., subsidiary, is a developer of proprietary catalytic converter technology used in its prototype Enviro Cat(TM) catalytic converter, which is designed to dramatically reduce toxic emissions, including nitrous oxide, expelled by internal combustion engines. The converter requires no precious metals in the manufacturing process, making it less expensive to produce.

The Company has also developed a new, highly efficient spark plug with the potential of increasing the efficiency of internal combustion engines, reducing toxic emissions while increasing fuel economy. Environmental Solutions holds Canadian patents and U.S. patent pending on its catalytic converter technology and is in the process of obtaining worldwide patent protection. The Company also holds a U.S. patent for its spark plug technology. For additional information, visit the Company's Web site at (www.cleanerfuture.com) or call Mark Nicole, CEO, or David Johnson, COO, at 905-947-9923.

This press release contains forward-looking statements within the meaning of the Private Securities Litigation Reform Act of 1995 (the ``Act'''). In particular, when used in the preceding discussion, the words ``plan,'' ``confident that,'' ``believe,'' ``expect,'' or ``intend to,'' and similar conditional expressions are intended to identify forward-looking statements within the meaning of the Act and are subject to the safe harbor created by the Act. Such statements are subject to certain risks and uncertainties and actual results could differ materially from those expressed in any of the forward-looking statements. Such risks and uncertainties include, but are not limited to, market conditions, general acceptance of the Company's products and technologies, competitive factors, the ability to successfully complete additional financings and other risks described in the Company's SEC reports and filings.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Contact:

Environmental Solutions Worldwide, Inc.
Mark Nicole, Chief Executive Officer, 905/947-9923


http://biz.yahoo.com/bw/001018/environmen.html

NetCurrents and Bowdens Launch CyberWatch Internet Intelligence Service
NetCurrents and Canada's Largest Media Monitoring Company Form Strategic Alliance
BURLINGAME, Calif.--(BUSINESS WIRE)--Oct. 18, 2000--NetCurrents Inc. (Nasdaq:NTCS - news), The Premier Internet Intelligence Agency, Wednesday announced that Toronto-based Bowdens Media Monitoring Ltd. has agreed to sell the CyberWatch Internet intelligence service, a new co-branded version of NetCurrents'AgencyFacts, to Bowdens' entire public and private client base throughout Canada.

Bowdens is the largest media monitoring company in Canada. AgencyFacts, which is currently being offered by a number of public relations and investor relations agencies in the United States, is the latest generation of NetCurrents' Internet intelligence products.

CyberWatch allows companies to easily monitor critical corporate information and perceptions on investor-focused Internet sites in real time, analyze that information and display results in a unique graphic format. The features incorporated in CyberWatch were developed after consulting with a range of public and private companies, as well as public and investor relations executives about their needs.

Bowdens President John Weinseis commented: ``CyberWatch will provide Bowdens' clients with the leading Internet intelligence tools needed to stay on top of on-line sentiment. As information on the Internet has become an important part of the investor and public relations landscape, it is critical for all companies to institute a comprehensive monitoring and collection program.

``CyberWatch will provide just that -- in a real-time, easy-to-use format.''

CyberWatch uses NetCurrents' proprietary real-time technology to review a wide variety of information disseminated on the Internet based on parameters defined by the client. It displays an analysis of the attitudes and perceptions concerning a company graphically on clients' desktops in six continuously updated bar charts.

CyberWatch also includes real-time e-mail alerts based on client-specified alert criteria and it offers the ability to ``drill down'' through its Online Topics of Discussion chart for a list of the last 10 messages retrieved, sorted by online sentiment.

NetCurrents' Chairman and Chief Executive Officer Irwin Meyer said, ``CyberWatch is a powerful tool. It will significantly enhance the services Bowdens can offer its clients. CyberWatch allows companies to monitor corporate sentiment on the Internet, helps them identify, and appropriately respond to, misinformation and aids them in evaluating corporate intelligence.

``In short, it helps management maximize the effectiveness of information derived from the Internet.''

For an online demonstration of AgencyFacts, visit www.netcurrents.com.

About NetCurrents Inc.

NetCurrents monitors and analyzes communications from the Internet in real time. The company provides clients with critical information and counsel to protect their corporate image, measure consumers' perceptions, and counter misinformation on the Internet. Due to the sensitivity of businesses that require this type of technology and analysis, the confidentiality of NetCurrents' clients is assured.

For more information on AgencyFacts and pricing, contact NetCurrents at 650/401-3200 and for more information about the company and its other products and services, visit its Web site at www.netcurrents.com.

About Bowdens Media Monitoring Ltd.

Bowdens Media Monitoring Ltd. provides press clippings from newspapers as well as tapes and transcripts from radio and television news and public affairs programming.

Their clients include large corporations, government departments and associations. Bowdens has headquarters in Toronto with offices in Vancouver, Edmonton, Calgary, Sudbury, Thunder Bay, Ottawa and affiliates in virtually all major Canadian centers.

For more information about Bowdens' CyberWatch and pricing, contact Bowdens at 877/269-3367 and for more information about Bowdens and its other products and services, visit its Web site at www.bowdens.com.

This news release contains forward-looking statement within the meaning of Section 37A of the Securities Act of 1933 and Section 21E of the Securities Exchange Act of 1934. These forward-looking statements involve risks and uncertainties. A number of factors could cause actual results to differ from those indicated in the forward-looking statements, including the inability of the two companies to operate effectively together, the continuance of the strategic alliance, the continued functionality of CyberWatch and lack of market acceptance of products and services offered by the alliance and general economic conditions. The company undertakes no obligation to publicly update or revise the forward-looking statements whether as a result of new information, future events or otherwise.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Contact:

Allen & Caron Inc.
Matt Clawson (investors), 949/474-4300
Matt@allencaron.com
or
Owen Daley (media), 949/474-4300
Owen@allencaron.com
or
Bowdens Media Monitoring
Marilyn Murack, 416/750-2220
mmurack@bowdens.com


http://biz.yahoo.com/bw/001018/ca_netcurr.html

"AIR FORCE MAINTENANCE ISSUES"

FROM ERIC ANTHONY, WLKI, Angola, IN . . . . .

Here are some actual maintenance complaints
submitted by US Air Force
pilots and the replies from the maintenance crews.

"Squawks" are problem listings that pilots generally
leave for
maintenance crews to fix before next flight.

(P)=PROBLEM (S)=SOLUTION

(P) Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
(S) Almost replaced left inside main tire.

(P) Test flight OK, except autoland very rough.
(S) Autoland not installed on this aircraft.

(P) #2 Propeller seeping prop fluid.
(S) #2 Propeller seepage normal - #1 #3 and #4
propellers lack normal seepage.

(P) Something loose in ****pit.
(S) Something tightened in ****pit.

(P) Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
(S) Evidence removed.

(P) DME volume unbelievably loud.
(S) Volume set to more believable level.

(P) Dead bugs on windshield.
(S) Live bugs on order.

(P) Autopilot in altitude hold mode produces a 200
fpm descent.
(S) Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

(P) IFF inoperative.
(S) IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

(P) Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
(S) That's what they're there for.

(P) Number three engine missing.
(S) Engine found on right wing after brief search.

(P) Aircraft handles funny.
(S) Aircraft warned to straighten up, "fly right",
and be serious.

(P) Target Radar hums.
(S) Reprogrammed Target Radar with the words.

(After reading this, I am reasonably certain that
we have the same
engineers as the Air Force working for us.)

Points to Ponder

A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk I have a work station...

Can atheists get insurance for acts of God?

If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?

Does fuzzy logic tickle?

If they arrested the Energizer Bunny, would they charge it with battery?

I believe five out of four people have trouble with fractions.

How come you never hear about gruntled employees?

How much faith does it take to be an atheist?

I don't have a solution, but I admire your problem.

If a tin whistle is made out of tin (and it is), then what, exactly, is fog horn made out of?

If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?

If atheists say there is no God, who do they think pops up the next Kleenex in the box?

Okay, who stopped the payment on my reality check?

I believe the only time the world beats a path to my door is when I'm in the bathroom.

Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?

What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?

What WAS the best thing before sliced bread?

Do you want much smaller government?

This is by far the most important question of this or any election season. If you do want much smaller government, it's obvious that you'll never get it with Republicans or Democrats — who are falling over themselves proposing new government programs, new ways to manage your life.

The only unmistakable vote you can cast — the only way you can tell the politicians you're fed up with big government and you won't tolerate it anymore — is to vote Libertarian.

Above taken from: http://harrybrown.org/

Submitted for sake of argument and does not necessarily reflect personal endorsement or belief.

The Ant And The Grasshopper

CLASSIC VERSION:

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.
The grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in the cold.


MODERN VERSION:

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.
CBS, NBC, ABC, CNN and FOX show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in is comfortable home with a table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp contrast.

How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?
Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries when they sing "It's Not Easy Being Green."
Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news stations film the group singing "We shall overcome". Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.
Al Gore exclaims in an interview with Peter Jennings that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and calls for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his "fair share".
Finally, the EEOC drafts the "Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act", retroactive to the beginning of the summer.
The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.
Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of federal judges that Bill appointed from a list of single-parent welfare recipients.
The ant loses the case.
The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't maintain it.
The ant has disappeared in the snow.
The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood.

Children's books that didn't make it:
1. You Are Different and That's Bad
2. The Boy Who Died From Eating All His Vegetables
3. Dad's New Wife Robert
4. Fun Four-letter Words to Know and Share
5. Hammers, Screwdrivers, and Scissors: An I-Can-Do-It Book
6. The Kids' Guide to Hitchhiking
7. Kathy Was So Bad Her Mom Stopped Loving Her
8. Curious George and the High Voltage Fence
9. All Cats Go To Hell
10. The Little Sissy Who Snitched
11. Some Kittens Can Fly
12. That's It! I'm Putting You Up For Adoption
13. Grandpa Gets a Casket
14. The Magic World Inside the Abandoned Refrigerator
15. Garfield Gets Feline Leukemia
16. The Pop-Up Book of Human Anatomy
17. Strangers Have the Best Candy
18. Whining, Kicking, and Crying to Get Your Way
19. You Were an Accident
20. Things Rich Kids Have, but You Never Will
21. Pop! Goes the Hamster ... and Other Great Microwave Games
22. The Man on the Moon is Actually Satan
23. Your Nightmares Are Real
24. Where Would You Like to be Buried?
25. Eggs, Toilet Paper, and Your School
26. Why Can't Mr. Fork and Ms. Electrical Outlet Be Friends?
27. Places Where Mommy and Daddy Hide Neat Things
28. Daddy Drinks Because You Cry
29. The Attention Deficit Disorder Association's Book of Wild Animals of North Amer -- Hey, Let's Go Ride Our Bikes!

The Street.com mentions NetCurrents

http://www.thestreet.com/_yahoo/funds/strategies/1112584.html

Searching For the Killer App of the Coming Wireless World
By John Rubino
Special to TheStreet.com
10/6/00 11:09 AM ET




We can argue about the timing, but not the result: Someday soon the world will be mostly wireless. One study, for instance, has the number of Internet-capable cell phones exceeding the number of PCs by 2003. Another puts unit sales of cell phone/personal digit assistant hybrids at better than 300 million a year by 2005.

That's good news for the handset makers, but because it's common knowledge you have to figure that it's already priced into their stocks.

The real action is in applications, i.e., the wireless services that road warriors will pay to use. Right now, everyone with Web content is adapting it to fit those tiny handheld device screens (for more on this, see my Sept. 8 column ). But it's not yet clear which app will end up as standard equipment on every device and turn its makers into instant giants. Some, like stock trading, are obvious winners, though it's hard to imagine any one broker dominating. Location tech, which tells you (and nearby merchants) where you are, is another good bet. (A column on those stocks is in the works.)

Customized intelligence gathering also will be hot. Check out NetCurrents (NTCS:Nasdaq - news), for example, which uses an expert system to scan the Web for information about a given company and cooks the result down to a graphic representation of investor sentiment. Click on any part of the graph, and you pull up the most recent posts on the major message boards.

Why is this valuable? Ask the people running Emulex (EMLX:Nasdaq - news). A few weeks back, a fake highly negative press release was posted on one of its message boards, panicking investors and shaving $2.5 billion from the company's market cap in a matter of hours. The post happened before the stock markets opened at 9:30 a.m. EDT, and Emulex didn't respond until 10:20 a.m.

NetCurrents' service, says CEO Irwin Meyer, would have alerted Emulex managers to the post almost immediately, allowing them to halt trading in their stock and to correct the record, stopping the panic before it had a chance to snowball.

Within two weeks, promises Meyer, his service will go wireless: "If you're on a plane, we'll be able to notify you immediately if something is amiss with your stock."

You have to think that this or something like it will soon be standard equipment on every control-freak manager's PalmPilot. But as Apple Computer (AAPL:Nasdaq - news) investors just discovered, a great product doesn't necessarily equal a great stock. Lately the market's perception of NetCurrents has been way negative, as its stock has fallen by more than 90% in six months, to just a little over a buck a share.

But in this case, reality is better than the perception, says Meyer. "Our operating trends are all positive. ... We have virtually no liabilities and enough working capital to last us 10 months." Besides, he adds, "We're always being offered money."

Another thing most of us will want on our handhelds is call management software, which InfoInterActive (IIAA:Nasdaq - news) is pioneering. This is one of my few remaining long positions, so keep that potential conflict in mind as you read on.

For a few bucks a month, InfoInterActive notifies you when a call comes in over the line you're using to access the Internet, allowing you to answer, ignore or send it to one of several voice mailboxes.

The service has been licensed by some big-name telcos, including Verizon (VZ:NYSE - news) and Sprint Canada, which led to some optimistic growth forecasts for 2000. These haven't panned out, and the stock has settled into a narrow trading range on extremely low volume.

But there are reasons to expect better things in 2001. First, the Verizon deal, which will give InfoInterActive access to around 5 million of the Baby Bell's customers, hasn't kicked in yet. When it does, in the first quarter of next year, it should produce a nice jump in subscribers.

Second, and potentially more important, is a recent linkup with Intel (INTC:Nasdaq - news), which bought a piece of the company and chose it to supply the call management capabilities for the chip giant's new line of information appliances. These will start shipping in the first quarter, with Intel predicting annual unit sales in the high six figures.

And a few days ago InfoInterActive released what it says is the first wireless call management application. Though this early version has a lot of limitations, it does let someone trading stocks on a Web-enabled phone know when a call comes in and then handles it for them.

Now for the final piece of this puzzle: According to a source at Intel, one of the reasons it bought into InfoInterActive was that the latter holds what looks to be defensible patents on Internet call management.

InfoInterActive hasn't chosen to defend the patents from the other companies offering such services because, says CEO Bill McMullen, "As a small company in a space typically dominated by the Nortels (NT:NYSE - news) and Lucents (LU:NYSE - news), we didn't think it would be wise to start by suing everyone. ... That's not to say that we won't ever start fights over these things."

Cool stories, these. But not sure things by any means. Both of these companies are tiny, untested and on the bleeding edge of businesses that barely exist at the moment. So be careful here. Don't bet big on either until they're clearly gaining traction.



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

John Rubino, a former equity and bond analyst, is a frequent contributor to Individual Investor, Your Money and Consumers Digest. His first book, Main Street, Not Wall Street, was published by William Morrow in 1998. At time of publication he was long InfoInterActive, though positions can change at anytime. While Rubino cannot provide investment advice or recommendations, he invites your feedback at jrubino@thestreet.com.

An English teacher was explaining to his students the concept of gender association in the English language. He stated how hurricanes at one time were given feminine names and how ships and planes were usually referred to as "she". One of the students raised their hand and asked, "What 'gender' is a computer"?

The teacher wasn't certain which it was, so he divided the class into two groups, males in one, females in the other, and asked them to decide if a computer should be masculine or feminine. Both groups were asked to give four reasons for their recommendation.

The group of women concluded that computers should be referred to in the masculine gender because:

1. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
2. They have a lot of data but are still clueless.
3. They are supposed to help you solve your problems, but half the time they ARE the problem.
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that, if you had waited a little longer, you could have had a better model.

The men, on the other hand, decided that computers should definitely be referred to in the feminine gender because:

1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic.
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
3. Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval.
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

NetCurrents Comments On Third Quarter Sales Increase, Customer Base Expansion
Internet Monitoring Sales Increase By Approximately 74% Over Previous Quarter; Customer Base Expands 122%
BURLINGAME, Calif.--(BUSINESS WIRE)--Oct. 4, 2000-- NetCurrents Inc. (Nasdaq:NTCS - news), ``The Premier Internet Intelligence Agency,'' today announced that sales of its Premier Internet monitoring services for the third quarter ended September 30, 2000, increased approximately 74 percent from sales of $233,878 for those same services in the second quarter of this year.

According to the announcement by NetCurrents Chairman and CEO Irwin Meyer, the company's customer base during the third quarter, when compared to the second quarter of this year, increased 122 percent to 71 customers. This includes channel partners who resell Agency Facts and other NetCurrents products and services to their clients, representing thousands of potential new NetCurrents clients.

``I am especially encouraged that we continue to show significant quarter-to-quarter increases in both Premier Internet monitoring sales and in the size of our client base with only our in-house sales force actively marketing the products,'' said NetCurrents Chief Financial Officer Michael Iscove. ``We believe the results of the first nine months of operation demonstrate the continuing and growing need for our services. We look forward to continued growth as sales from our strategic alliance and channel partners begin to have a positive impact on revenues in the coming months.

``As of September 30, the Company's balance sheet showed approximately $4.6 million in cash and cash equivalents and no bank or long-term debt,'' Iscove continued. ``At our current levels of sales and spending and without raising any additional funds, we believe we have sufficient capital resources to adequately fund our operations until mid-summer 2001. Of course, as our sales continue to increase, the Company will move closer to generating positive cash flow.''

Meyer said, ``For the benefit of those who may have been receiving mixed, and sometimes inaccurate, messages on the Internet about the prospects of the Company, I would like to set the record straight. The level of sales generated by our in-house sales force continues to be very promising. The launches of our channel sales partnerships, while taking longer than originally expected, are still moving forward in respect to product readiness, training and contractual details. We fully expect that the previously announced relationships with Thomson Financial Carson (formerly Thomson Financial Investor Relations), Kroll Risk Consulting Services and Burrelle's Information Services will all be generating sales by the end of the fourth quarter, with the first of these to be launched this month.''

As the Company continues to execute its business plan, aspects of that plan have evolved as new opportunities have presented themselves. ``We have been careful to communicate these new opportunities only as they have become reality and will continue to do so in the future,'' Meyer added. ``With the addition of new clients each month and the continued growth in revenues, we gain greater insight into how our products and services can be applied to meet the needs of the market. We are optimistic about the near- and long-term prospects of NetCurrents as our products and services continue to receive validation from our new and ongoing clients and our strategic alliance partners.''

``It is also important to note,'' he added, ``that due to the sensitive nature of the services we provide, many of our clients insist on remaining anonymous. Since we must honor the confidentiality requests of our clients, we are often unable to publicly disclose their names.''

About NetCurrents Inc.

NetCurrents, ``The Premier Internet Intelligence Agency,'' analyzes communications from more than 63,000 targeted Internet locations in real-time. The Company provides clients with critical information and counsel to protect their corporate image, measure consumers' perceptions, and counter misinformation on the Internet. Due to the sensitivity of businesses that require this type of technology and analysis, the confidentiality of NetCurrents' clients is assured. For more information visit the company's Web site at www.netcurrents.com.

This news release contains forward-looking statements within the meaning of Section 37A of the Securities Act of 1933 and Section 21E of the Securities Exchange Act of 1934. These forward-looking statements involve risks and uncertainties. A number of factors could cause actual results to differ from those indicated in the forward-looking statements, including the company's ability to continue to successfully market and provide its services and maintain their effectiveness, ongoing sales of the company's products, continuance of the company's strategic alliances and general economic conditions. The company undertakes no obligation to publicly update or revise forward-looking statements whether as a result of new information, future events, or otherwise.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Contact:

For NetCurrents Inc,
Allen & Caron Inc., 949/474-4300
Matt Clawson (Investors)
matt@allencaron.com
Owen Daley (Media)
owen@allencaron.com


http://biz.yahoo.com/bw/001004/ca_netcurr.html

Nevermind, done deal.

From the New Tel (NWLL) board: "The filter will no longer block "Saturday""

The Corporate Mind ------------------

Here is a look into the corporate mind that is very interesting, educational, historical, completely true, and hysterical all at the same time:

The US standard railroad gauge (width between the two rails) is 4 feet, 8.5 inches. That's an exceedingly odd number.
Why was that gauge used?

Because that's the way they built them in England, and the US railroads were built by English expatriates.

Why did the English build them like that? Because the first rail lines were built by the same people who built the pre-railroad tramways, and that's the gauge they used.

Why did "they" use that gauge then? Because the people who built the tramways used the same jigs and tools that they used for building wagons which used that wheel spacing.

Okay! Why did the wagons have that particular odd wheel spacing? Well, if they tried to use any other spacing, the wagon wheels would break on some of the old, long distance roads in England, because that's the spacing of the wheel ruts.

So who built those old rutted roads? The first long distance roads in Europe (and England) were built by Imperial Rome for their legions. The roads have been used ever since. And the ruts in the roads? Roman war chariots first formed the initial ruts, which everyone else had to match for fear of destroying their wagon wheels. Since the chariots were made for (or by) Imperial Rome, they were all alike in the matter of wheel spacing. The United States standard railroad gauge of 4 feet, 8.5 inches derives from the original specification for an Imperial Roman war chariot.

Specifications and bureaucracies live forever. So the next time you are handed a specification and wonder what horse's ass came up with it, you may be exactly right, because the Imperial Roman war chariots were made just wide enough to accommodate the back ends of two war horses.

Thus, we have the answer to the original question.

Now the twist to the story..............

There's an interesting extension to the story about railroad gauges and horses' behinds. When we see a Space Shuttle sitting on its launch pad, there are two big booster rockets attached to the sides of the main fuel tank. These are solid rocket boosters, or SRBs. The SRBs are made by Thiokol at their factory in Utah. The engineers who designed the SRBs might have preferred to make them a bit fatter, but the SRBs had to be shipped by train from the factory to the launch site.
The railroad line from the factory had to run through a tunnel in the mountains. The SRBs had to fit through that tunnel. The tunnel is slightly wider than the railroad track, and the railroad track is about as wide as two horses' behinds.

So, the major design feature of what is arguably the world's most advanced transportation system was determined over two thousand years ago by the width of a Horse's A-s-s!

(stolen from a friend)

Inmate in charge of asylum?

A humble thank you, Matt. Hopefully, we can keep it clean yet not prudish. Humourous, yet not too blue.

Laughter...nature's medicine.

From "This Weeks Pick" newsletter http://www.thisweekspick.com/ :

No one said it would be "easy" in the formation of a United Europe, with one currency, and one standard business platforms. The greatest barrier now seems to appease Germany and England, the 2 banking centers ....and a language standard for business. Here is a Humurous look at a solution;

Euro English:

The European commission has just announced an agreement that English will be the official language of European Community (EU) rather than German (the other possibility).

As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement, and has accepted a 5-year phase-in of new rules that would apply to the language and reclassify it as EuroEnglish. The agreed plan is as follows:

In year 1, the soft 'c' would be replaced by 's'. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard 'c' will be replased by 'k'. This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan now have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome 'ph' is replased by 'f'. This will reduse 'fotograf' by 20%.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptance of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent 'e's in the language is disgrasful, and they should eliminat them.

By year 4, peopl wil be reseptiv to lingwistik korektions such as replasing 'th' with 'z' and 'w' with 'v' (saving mor keyboard spas).

During ze fifz year, ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vords kontaining 'ou' and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.

After zis fifz year, ve vil hav a reli sensibil riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubls or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand ech ozer. ZE DREM VIL FINALI KUM TRU!!!

Mommie's "wash your mouth out with soap" profanity deletion feature may be a bit restrictive. The rascal edited the middle of the name of the day of the week..."Sa****ay".

http://www.investorshub.com/beta/read_msg.asp?message_id=11357

Isn't that just a little restrictive, especially when COB could delete the whole post if it did indeed contain offensive material? Until now, I never even noticed that my weekends always featured a **** in them.

Wife 1.0
To Technical Support:
Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that the new program began
unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. No mention of this
phenomenon was included in the product brochure. In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other
programs and launches during system initialization, where it monitors all other system activity.
Applications such as Poker night 10.3, Boys Night Out 2.5 and Sa****ay Football 5.0 or Golf 4.0 no
longer run; crashing the system whenever selected. I cannot seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the
background while attempting to run some of my other favorite applications. I am thinking about
going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but un-install does not work on this program. Can you help me,
please!!! Otherwise, I'm stuck..
Thanks, Stuck


Dear Stuck:
This is a very common problem men complain about but is mostly due to a primary
misconception. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 with the idea that Wife 1.0 is
merely a "UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT" program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and
designed by its creator to run EVERYTHING. It is unlikely you would be able to purge Wife 1.0 and
still convert back to Girlfriend 7.0. Hidden operating files within your system would cause Girlfriend
7.0 to emulate Wife 1.0 so nothing is gained. It is impossible to uninstall, delete, or purge the program files from
the system once installed. You can not go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife1.0 is not designed to
do this. Some have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but end up with more problems than
the original system. Look in your manual under "Warnings-Alimony /Child Support."
I recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and just deal with the situation. Having Wife 1.0 installed myself, I
might also suggest you read the entire section regarding General Partnership Faults (GPFs). YOU
must assume all responsibility for faults and problems that might occur, regardless of their cause.
The best course of action will be to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE.exe. In any case avoid
excessive use of the "Esc" key because ultimately you will have to run the
APOLOGIZE.foreverything.exe command before the operating system will return to normal. Note:
In some rare (but becoming more common) cases you will need to run the APOLOGIZE.foreverything.exe
command routinely - the time frame between commands is approximately 28 days. The system will run smooth as long
as you take the blame for all the GPFs. Wife 1.0 is a great system but very high maintenance.
Consider buying addition software to improve the performance of Wife 1.0. We recommend
Flowers 2.1 and Chocolates 5.0. Do not, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short
Skirt 3.3. This is not a supported application for Wife 1.0 and will DEFINITELY cause software
conflicts, possibly also hardware conflicts which will cause irreversible damage to the operating
system.
Best of luck.
Tech Support ......

OT 101Dahlias, Its good enough for a re-read.

Very creative. Even received it via email newsletter a couple weeks back and had to read it again. Haven't we all had some of the same feelings from time to time?

These quotes were taken from actual employee performance evaluations:

-"Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to dig."

-"His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity."

-"I would not allow this employee to breed."

-"This employee is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a won't-be."

-"Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap."

-"When she opens her mouth, it seems that it is only to change feet."

-"He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle."

-"This young lady has delusions of adequacy."

-"He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them."

-"This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot."

-"This employee should go far, and the sooner the better."

-"Got a full six-pack, but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together."

-"A gross ignoramus - 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus."

-"He doesn't have ulcers, but he is a carrier."

-"He's been working with glue too much."

-"He would argue with a signpost."

-"He has a knack for making strangers immediately."

-"He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the room."

-"When his IQ reaches 50, we should sell."

-"If you see two people talking and one looks bored, he's the other one."

-"A prime candidate for natural deselection."

-"Donated his brain to science before he was done using it."

-"Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming."

-"Has two brains: one is lost, the other is out looking for it."

-"If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week."

-"If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change."

-"If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean."

-"Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only gargled."

-"Takes him 2 hours to watch 60 minutes."

-"The wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead."

No position yet.

Christmas shopping season is here already. Sharper Image may have a very hot item in the Razor and its variants; the Razor Wheel.e and Razor Xtreme. Will we soon see trick riding like the extreme bikers?

The scooter was mentioned on ABC's Paul Harvey news a couple weeks back. He made mention of all the injuries resulting from use of these little scooters. But wait, in almost a back-handed endorsement, he then made mention of the algebraic multiple of injuries from inline skate use. The scooters are a lot safer (mother approved?).

Ionic Breeze is also the star of a late night infomercial. Sharper Image is selling on the web, instore, on TV, via catalog, magazine ads. What next...door-to-door?

I've dealt with Sharper Image. Always first rate product quality and superb service.

LGOV back on active list

http://www.otcbb.com/news/Updates/diu091800.stm

Now, if we could only get some PR

Five surgeons are discussing who makes the best patients to operate on.

The first surgeon says, "I like to see accountants on my operating table, because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered."

The second responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is color coded."

The third surgeon says, "No, I really think librarians are the best; everything inside them is in alphabetical order."

The fourth surgeon chimes in: "You know, I like construction workers, those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end, and when the job takes longer than you said it would."

But the fifth surgeon shut them all up when he observed: "You're all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, and no spine, and the head and butt are interchangeable."

PMXX

They're developing a composite railroad tie "proven to be 230% stronger and last 300% longer than traditional wood ties."
http://www.primixcorp.com/
Competitors: TieTek by NATK and US Plastic Lunber, USPL.
Primix, PMXX, (not to be confused with PMIX-PRIMIX Solutions Inc) is presently working on filing for OTCBB, audit recently completed. Annual High: 2.12 Annual Low: 0.37 Currently 2.00


no position..........yet

2 step remove in "favorites"

I'm a bit "mouse challenged" and always in a hurry. I sometimes accidently click remove when I'm shooting for the favorite thread link. How about a "do you really want to delete" second chance to correct clutz-enous? Or should I be required to re-add a favorite to teach me to slow down

NetCurrents to Present At Two Investment Conferences
BURLINGAME, Calif.--(BUSINESS WIRE)--Sept. 7, 2000--NetCurrents Inc. (Nasdaq:NTCS - news), The Premier Internet Intelligence Agency, announced today that it will be presenting to a group of institutional investors, securities analysts and other investment professionals this month at the First Security® Van Kasper Class of 2000 Conference in San Francisco and the 2nd Annual Brown Simpson Asset Management Investment Forum in New York City.

The First Security® Van Kasper Class of 2000 Conference will take place on September 11-13 at The Ritz-Carlton San Francisco. The conference will feature concurrent presentations by a group of private and growth stock companies selected by the Van Kasper Research and Investment Banking Teams. NetCurrents will make its presentation on September 11 at 2 p.m. followed by a question and answer ``break out'' session.

The Brown Simpson Asset Management Investment Forum, held on Tuesday, September 12 at the Four Seasons Hotel in New York City, will provide various publicly traded companies the opportunity to present to a broad audience. NetCurrents will present at 4:30 p.m.; there will be a separate ``break out'' session where management will answer questions.

According to NetCurrents Chairman and CEO Irwin Meyer, ``Both of these conferences represent a significant opportunity to discuss NetCurrents' real-time Internet monitoring and analysis systems and products to a large audience of institutional investors and other investment community professionals. Our unique technologies have already lead to strategic alliances with such major entities as Kroll Risk Consulting Services, Burrelle's Information Services and Thomson Investor Relations and our list of direct corporate customers continues to grow.''

About NetCurrents Inc.

NetCurrents, The Premier Internet Intelligence Agency, analyzes communications from a universe of targeted Internet locations in real-time. The Company provides clients with critical information and counsel to protect their corporate image, measure consumers' perceptions, and counter misinformation on the Internet. For more information visit the Web site at www.netcurrents.com.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Contact:

Allen & Caron Inc., 949/474-4300
Matt Clawson (investors), matt@allencaron.com
Owen Daley (media), owen@allencaron.com

http://biz.yahoo.com/bw/000907/ca_netcurr.html

Maybe some volume will soon follow.

Abraham and Dot

An old bearded shepherd, with a crooked staff, walked up to a stone pulpit and said.... "And it came to pass that the trader by the name of Abraham Com did take unto himself a young wife by the name of Dot.

And Dot Com was a comely women, broad of shoulder and long of leg. Indeed, she had been called Amazon Dot Com. And she said unto Abraham, her husband, "Why doth thou travel far, from town to town, with thy goods when thou can trade without ever leaving thy tent?"

And Abrahama did look at her as though she were several saddle bags short of a camel load, but simply said, "How, dear?"
And Dot replied, " I will place drums in all the towns and drums in between to send messages saying what you have for sale--and they will reply telling you which hath the best price. And the sale can be made on the drums and Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS).

Abraham thought loud and long and decided he would let Dot have her way with the drums. And Dot said, "There will be a lot of banging in the land."
And Abraham replied, "It is my most fervent wish that this be so."

And the drums rang out and were an immediate success. Abraham sold all the goods he had, at the top price, without ever moving from his tent.

But his success did arouse envy. A man named Maccabia did secrete himself inside Abraham's drum and was accused of insider trading. And the young did take to Dot Com's trading as doth the greedy horsefly to camel dung. They were called Nomadi Ecclesiastical Rich Dominican Siderites...NERDS for short.

And lo the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and the deafening sound of drums, that no one noticed that the real riches were going to the drum maker, one Brother William of Gates, who bought up every drum company in the land. And indeed did insist on making drums that would only work if you bought Brother Gates' drumsticks.
And Dot did say, "Oh Abraham, what we have started is being taken over by others.
And as Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel, or as it came to be known "eBay", he said, "we need a name of a service that reflects what we are."
And Dot replied, "Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators."
"Whoopee!" said Abraham.
"No, YAHOO!" Dot Com said.

NetCurrents Launches First-Ever Real-Time Internet Sentiment Monitoring Analysis of Nasdaq-100
No-Charge Access for Individuals, Investment Professionals, Media; 24/7 Scanning of More Than 60,000 Relevant Internet Sites
BURLINGAME, Calif.--(BUSINESS WIRE)--Sept. 6, 2000-- NetCurrents Inc. (Nasdaq:NTCS - news), ``The Premier Internet Intelligence Agency,'' today announced that it has launched a unique free service on its corporate Web site -- www.netcurrents.com -- for individuals, investment community professionals and the media that monitors in real time positive, negative or neutral Internet sentiment shared by online participants about individual companies in the Nasdaq-100 Index.

Based on the company's patent-pending proprietary technology enabling real-time scanning of more than 63,000 Internet sites, the first-ever service will continuously monitor, display and quantify in a graphic format the combined overall Internet sentiment for the select group of 100 Nasdaq-traded companies that make up the Index.

According to NetCurrents Chairman and CEO Irwin Meyer, ``Internet attitudes and perceptions regarding the Nasdaq-100 Index as a whole are presented in an easy-to-read graphical display. The site also displays graphically those Index companies that are perceived most and least favorably. As an added analytical tool, the Index site displays the difference, within three percent, in the volume of positive and/or negative messages received on a particular company today compared with yesterday.''

The NetCurrents Nasdaq-100 monitoring service will also supply such specific data as the Nasdaq-100 company that is most discussed on the Internet at any given moment and the message boards generating the most positive and negative comments, respectively. And with a simple click, a user can call up by ticker symbol or name any one of the Nasdaq-100 companies for its real-time sentiment report

``A recent survey conducted by the National Association of Investors Corporation,'' Meyer continued, ``showed that 95 percent of individual investors polled rated the Internet as their most important source of information. We believe that investors, investment community professionals and market watchers can use real-time Internet sentiment information about the Nasdaq-100 as part of an informed investment decision or to help analyze, moment by moment, conditions and trends in the stock market as a whole.''

The monitoring of the Nasdaq-100 for Internet perceptions and attitudes uses NetCurrents' proprietary, real-time Internet search technology, F.I.R.S.T. (Fast Internet Real-Time Search Technology) and the WebMind Artificial Intelligence engine to dynamically monitor and analyze a targeted Internet universe. It gathers and analyzes the information in real time based on a defined set of parameters, displaying graphically an analysis of attitudes and perceptions presented continuously in updated bar charts.

This product is the first of its kind to combine Internet search technology with artificial intelligence to provide real-time automated sentiment analysis of Internet communications.

About NetCurrents Inc.

NetCurrents, ``The Premier Internet Intelligence Agency,'' monitors and analyzes communications from the Internet in real time. The company provides clients with critical information and counsel to protect their corporate image, measure consumers' perceptions, and counter misinformation on the Internet. Due to the sensitivity of businesses that require this type of technology and analysis, the confidentiality of NetCurrents' clients is assured.

For more information about NetCurrents products and services, contact the company at 650/401-3200 and for information about the company, visit its Web site at www.netcurrents.com

This news release contains forward-looking statements within the meaning of Section 37A of the Securities Act of 1933 and Section 21E of the Securities Exchange Act of 1934. These forward-looking statements involve risks and uncertainties. A number of factors could cause actual results to differ from those indicated in the forward-looking statements, including the company's ability to continue to successfully market and provide the Nasdaq-100 service and maintain its effectiveness and general economic conditions. The company undertakes no obligation to publicly update or revise forward-looking statements whether as a result of new information, future events or otherwise.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Contact:

For NetCurrents Inc.,
Allen & Caron Inc., 949/474-4300
Matt Clawson (Investors)
matt@allencaron.com
Owen Daley (Media)
owen@allencaron.com

http://biz.yahoo.com/bw/000906/ca_netcurr.html

Nice way to showcase their product, don't you think?

DD links

taken from Yahoo! posting
http://messages.yahoo.com/bbs?.mm=FN&board=7083624&tid=tpeg&sid=7083624&action=m&mid=51030&mid=

NTCS DD LINKS:
by: internet_shogun 9/4/00 4:39 pm
Msg: 51030 of 51049

NTCS Newbies & Interested Longs.

In an effort for investors to easily find DD links on the internet, I’ve enclosed the following URL links along with the estimated reading time for thorough due diligence.

NTCS Website: http://www.netcurrents.com/ 2 Hrs.

Yahoo Profile: http://biz.yahoo.com/p/n/ntcs.html 1Hr.

PR’s (Clients, Strategic Alliances, Qtrly Reports) : http://www.netcurrents.com/corp/press/releases.html 4 Hrs.

Strategic Alliance Partners’ Websites: 9Hrs.
Thompsons Financial: http://www.thomsonir.com/ 1 Hr.
Burrelles: http://www.burrelles.com/ and http://www.burrelles.com/indexwm.html 1 Hr.
Kroll O’Gara: http://www.krollworldwide.com/home.cfm and http://www.krollworldwide.com/serv_eeci_thcc.cfm 2 Hrs.
Intelligenisis: http://www.intelligenesis.net/ , Go to ‘Webmind’ section, http://www.intelligenesis.net/testResults/trpage.html 3 Hrs.
Datalink: http://www.datalink.net/ 1Hr.
Computer Associates: http://www.ca.com/ 1Hr.

Known Clients: 1Hr.
EMC (NYSE-EMC): http://www.netcurrents.com/corp/press/releases/release032000.html
Oracle (NASDAQ – ORCL): http://www.netcurrents.com/corp/press/releases/release050400.html
Earthlink (NASDAQ – ELNK): http://www.netcurrents.com/corp/press/releases/release022200.html
Tibco (NASDAQ – TIBX): http://www.netcurrents.com/corp/press/releases/release004.html
Gadzooxs (NASDAQ – ZOOX): http://www.netcurrents.com/corp/press/releases/release021400.html

NTCS’s Investment Banker, H.C. Wainwright: http://www.hcwainwright.com/
And http://www.netcurrents.com/corp/press/releases/release030600.html 1Hr.

Private Placement Investors, Brown Simpson Strategic Growth Fund ($34M Investment): Restricted Website: http://www.brownsimpson.com/

Investor Relations (2 Firms) 1Hr.
Allen & Caron: http://www.allencaron.com/
Continental Capital & Equity: http://www.insidewallstreet.com/index.php

Most Recent Internet Vcall (Must have sound card): http://www.vcall.com/NASApp/VCall/EventPage?ID=25045. 1Hr.

SEC Filings: http://www.10kwizard.ragingbull.com/fil_list.asp?sym=ntcs 20 Hrs.

Internet Message Boards: (Reading all posts = 40Hrs+, estimated)
Yahoo (Over 50,000 posts): http://messages.yahoo.com/?action=q&board=NTCS
Raging Bull (Over 2,800 posts):
http://quote.ragingbull.altavista.com/quote.cgi?1003=NTCS&mode=d
iHub (you're already here)

No hype, just facts. FACT

You decide.

Shogun