Things that Bug Me (BUGG)

[teapeebubbles]

burp has been mia for over 6 years

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where is burp?

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get this vidlit,

great site

http://www.vidlit.com/orthodox/

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Learn Yiddish with Dick and Jane

http://www.vidlit.com/yidlit/yidlit.html

[teapeebubbles]

Sarcastic remarks to get you through the day:

1. And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be...?
2. Do I look like a damn people person?
3. This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.
4. I started out with nothing & still have most of it left.
5. I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me.
6. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
7. If I throw a stick, will you leave?
8. You!... Off my planet!
9. If I want to hear the pitter patter of little feet, I'll put shoes on my cats.
10. Does your train of thought have a caboose?
11. The Bible was written by the same people who said the Earth was flat.
12. Did the aliens forget to remove your a nal probe?
13. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
14. A hard-on doesn't count as personal growth.
15. A PBS mind in an MTV world.
16. Allow me to introduce my selves.
17. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.
18. Suburbia: where they tear out the trees & then name streets after them.
19. Well, this day was a total waste of makeup.
20. See no evil, hear no evil, date no evil.
21. Are those your eyeballs? I found them in my cleavage.
22. I'm not your type. I'm not inflatable.
23. I have a computer, a vibrator, & pizza delivery. Why should I leave the house?
24. Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.
25. Did I mention the kick in the groin you'll be receiving if you touch me?
26. It ain't the size, it's... no, it's the size.
27. A woman's favorite position is CEO.
28. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
29. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
30. Stress is when you wake up screaming & you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.
31. Can I trade this job for what's behind door #1?
32. I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
33. Okay, okay, I take it back! UnF uck you!
34. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
35. Macho Law prohibits me from admitting I'm wrong.
36. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
37. Chaos, panic, & disorder - my work here is done.
38. I plead contemporary insanity.
39. And which dwarf are you?
40. Meandering to a different drummer.

[Burpzilla]

When I'm typing something in the SEARCH box and the browser refreshes, wiping out what I just typed.

That REALLY bugs me.

[Burpzilla]

Super long iBoxxes. Those bug me.

The length of an iBox is directly proportional to how much a POS a stock is, it seems. Check out the box for QBID for example:

http://www.investorshub.com/boards/board.asp?board_id=100

I actually had to change my scroll wheel halfway to the bottom. Got a flat.

[teapeebubbles]

women's bumper stickers
>
>
> SO MANY MEN, SO FEW WHO CAN AFFORD ME.
>
> GOD MADE US SISTERS, PROZAC MADE US FRIENDS.
>
> COFFEE, CHOCOLATE, MEN ... SOME THINGS ARE JUST BETTER RICH.
>
> DON'T TREAT ME ANY DIFFERENTLY THAN YOU WOULD THE QUEEN.
>
> I'M OUT OF ESTROGEN AND I HAVE A GUN.
>
> WARNING: I HAVE AN ATTITUDE AND I KNOW HOW TO USE IT.
>
> OF COURSE I DON'T LOOK BUSY...I DID IT RIGHT THE FIRST TIME.
>
> DO NOT START WITH ME. YOU WILL NOT WIN.
>
> ALL STRESSED OUT AND NO ONE TO CHOKE.
>
> I CAN BE ONE OF THOSE BAD THINGS THAT HAPPENS TO BAD PEOPLE.
>
> HOW CAN I MISS YOU IF YOU WON'T GO AWAY?
>
> DON'T UPSET ME! I'M RUNNING OUT OF PLACES TO HIDE THE BODIES.
>
> And my personal favorite!.............
>
> IF YOU WANT BREAKFAST IN BED, SLEEP IN THE KITCHEN

[Burpzilla]

Pedestrians who come to an intersection and then punch the WALK button a dozen times... slam-slam-slam-slam-slam... like, do they think the pole contains "slow" electricity or something?

That bugs me.

[teapeebubbles]

Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking,
sensitive man?
A: A rumor

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Did you know that when you envy someone, it's because you really like that person?

Did you know that those who appear to be very strong in heart, are real weak and most susceptible?

Did you know that those who spend their time protecting others are the ones that really need some one to protect them?

Did you know that the three most difficult things to say are: I love you, Sorry and help me The people who say these are actually in need of them or really feel them, and are the ones you really need to treasure, because they have said them.

Did you know that people who occupy themselves by keeping others company or helping others are the ones that actually need your company and help?

Did you know that those who dress in red are more confident in themselves?

Did you know that those who dress in yellow are those that enjoy their beauty?

Did you know that those who dress in black, are those who want to be unnoticed and need your help and understanding?

Did you know that when you help someone, the help is returned in two folds?

Did you know that those who need more of you are those that don't mention it to you?

Did you know that it's easier to say what you feel in writing than saying it to someone in the face? But did you know that it has more value when you say it to their face?

Did you know that what is most difficult for you to say or do is much more valuable than anything that is valuable that you can buy with money?

Did you know that if you ask for something in faith, your wishes are granted?

Did you know that you can make your dreams come true, like falling in love, becoming rich, staying healthy, if you ask for it by faith, and if you really knew, you'd be surprised by what you could do.

But don't believe everything I tell you, until you try it for yourself, if you know someone that is in need of something that I mentioned, and you know that you can help, you'll see that it will be returned in two-fold .

[teapeebubbles]

Q: How many Microsoft programmers does it take to write a
great piece of software?
A: More...

[teapeebubbles]

Procrastinator's Creed

1. I believe that if anything is worth doing,
it would have been done already.

2. I shall never move quickly, except to avoid
more work or find excuses.

3. I will never rush into a job without a life-
time of consideration.

4. I shall meet all of my deadlines directly in
proportion to the amount of bodily injury I
could expect to receive from missing them.

5. I firmly believe that tomorrow holds the
possibility for new technologies, astounding
discoveries, and a reprieve from my
obligations.

6. I truly believe that all deadlines are
unreasonable regardless of the amount of
time given.

7. If at first I don't succeed, there is always
next year.

8. I shall always decide not to decide, unless
of course I decide to change my mind.

9. I shall always begin, start, initiate, take
the first step, and/or write the first word,
when I get around to it.

10. I will never put off tomorrow, what I can
forget about forever.

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30 HARSH THINGS A WOMAN CAN SAY TO A
NAKED MAN

1. I've smoked fatter joints than that.
2. Ahhhh, it's cute.
3. Why don't we just cuddle?
4. You know they have surgery to fix that.
5. Make it dance.
6. Can I paint a smiley face on it?
7. Wow, and your feet are so big.
8. It's OK, we'll work around it.
9. Will it squeak if I squeeze it?
10. Oh no... a flash headache.
11. (giggle and point)
12. Can I be honest with you?
13. How sweet, you brought incense.
14. This explains your car.
15. Maybe if we water it, it'll grow.
16. Why is God punishing me?
17. At least this won't take long.
18. I never saw one like that before.
19. But it still works, right?
20. It looks so unused.
21. Maybe it looks better in natural light.
22. Why don't we skip right to the cigarettes?
23. Are you cold?
24. If you get me real drunk first.
25. Is that an optical illusion?
26. What is that?
27. It's a good thing you have so many other
talents.
28. Does it come with an air pump?
29. So this is why you're supposed to judge people
on personality.
30. I guess this makes me the 'early bird'

[teapeebubbles]

Today, be aware of how you are spending your 1,440 beautiful moments, and spend them wisely

[teapeebubbles]

20 WAYS TO CONFUSE (AND UPSET) SANTA CLAUS

1. Instead of milk and cookies, leave him a salad
and a note explaining that you think he could
stand to lose a few pounds.

2. While he's in the house, go find his sleigh
and write him a speeding ticket.

3. Leave him a note explaining that you've gone
away for the holidays. Ask if he would mind
watering your plants.

4. While he's in the house, replace all his
reindeer with exact replicas. Then wait and see
what happens when he tries to get them to fly.

5. Keep an angry bull in your living room. If you
think a bull goes crazy when he sees a little
red cape, wait until he sees that big, red
Santa suit!

6. Build an army of mean-looking snowmen on the
roof, holding signs that say "We hate Christmas"
and "Go away Santa."

7. Leave a note by the telephone telling Santa that
Mrs. Claus called and wanted to remind him to
pick up some milk and a loaf of bread on his
way home.

8. Throw a surprise party for Santa when he comes
down the chimney. Refuse to let him leave until
that huge cake arrives.

9. While he's in the house, find the sleigh and
sit in it. As soon as he comes back and sees
you, tell him that he shouldn't have missed that
last payment, and take off.

10. Leave a plate filled with cookies and a glass of
milk out with a note that says, "For The Tooth
Fairy. :)" Leave another plate out with half a
stale cookie and a few drops of skim milk in a
dirty glass with a note that says, "For Santa.
:("

11. Take everything out of your house as if it's just
been robbed. When Santa arrives, show up dressed
like a policeman and say, "Well, well. They
always return to the scene of the crime."

12. Leave out a copy of your Christmas list with last-
minute changes and corrections.

13. While he's in the house, cover the top of the
chimney with barbed wire.

14. Leave lots of hunting trophies and guns out where
Santa's sure to see them. Go outside, yell, "Ooh!
Look! A deer! And he's got a red nose!" and fire
a gun.

15. Leave Santa a note explaining that you've moved.
Include a map with unclear and hard-to-read
directions to your new house.

16. Set a bear trap at the bottom of the chimney.
Wait for Santa to get caught in it, and then
explain that you're sorry, but from a distance,
he looked like a bear.

17. Leave out a Santa suit, with a dry-cleaning bill.

18. Paint "hoof-prints" all over your face and clothes.
While he's in the house, go out on the roof. When
he comes back up, act like you've been trampled."
Threaten to sue.

19. Instead of ornaments, decorate your tree with
Easter eggs.

20. Dress up like the Easter Bunny. Wait for Santa to
come and then say, "This neighborhood ain't big
enough for the both of us."

[gotmilk]

That pc firewall Bruce The Terminator always recommends,
call Zone Alarm, has nutt'n to do with keep'n a fire from
heat'n up my pc.... NOR does it make ANY alarm sounds.

Anyway, whats with the Zone reference anywho?

[gotmilk]

Myself have'n bad breath so bad that...

... people think I never toot a fart,
but,
pass the gas in my rectum as either a burp,
or as gotmilkSpeak.

Now there'r a pic for Paulie Pixel to create...

... gotmilk fart'n burp towards person speak'n to/towards
as,
they run away holding nose shut

:o)

[teapeebubbles]

Putdowns

- Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just
don't have film.

- He, who laughs last, thinks slowest.

- A day without sunshine is like, well, night.

- On the other hand, you have different fingers.

- Back up my hard drive? How do I put it in
reverse?

- I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar
territory.

- I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel
universe.

- She's always late. Her ancestors arrived on the
Juneflower.

- Pardon my driving, I am reloading.

- Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented
fool

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Famous Last Words:

-- I'll get a world record for this..
-- It's fireproof.
-- He's probably just hibernating.
-- What does this button do?
-- I'm making a citizen's arrest.
-- So, you're a cannibal.
-- It's probably just a rash.
-- Are you sure the power is off?
-- Yeah, I made the deciding vote on the jury,
so what of it?
-- The odds of that happening have to be a
million to one!
-- Pull the pin and count to what?
-- Which wire was I supposed to cut?
-- I wonder where the mother bear is.
-- I've seen this done on TV.
-- These are the good kind of mushrooms.
-- I'll hold it and you light the fuse.
-- Let it down slowly.
-- Rat poison only kills rats.
-- Just take whatever you want, this is a
ghost town.
-- It's strong enough for both of us.
-- This doesn't taste right.
-- I can make this light before it changes.
-- Nice doggie.
-- I can do that with my eyes closed.
-- I've done this before.
-- Well, we've made it this far.
-- That's odd.
-- You wouldn't hit a guy with glasses on,
would you?
-- Don't be so superstitious.
-- Now watch this.
-- What duck?

[teapeebubbles]

TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING GERMAN :

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.

[teapeebubbles]

Top Ten of Silliest Questions asked on a Cruise
Ship:

10. Do these steps go up or down?

9. What do you do with the beautiful ice carvings
after they melt?

8. Which elevator do I take to get to the front
of the ship?

7. Does the crew sleep on the ship?

6. Is this island completely surrounded by water?

5. Does the ship make it's own electricity?

4. Is it salt water in the toilets?

3. What elevation are we at?

2. There's a photographer on board who takes photos
and displays them the next day... the question
asked...If the pictures aren't marked, how will
I know which ones are mine?

1. What time is the Midnight Buffet being served?

[teapeebubbles]

10 Things That Piss Me Off

1. People who point at their wrist while asking
for the time. I know where my watch is, buddy...
Where the fuck is yours? Do I point at my
crotch when asking where the bathroom is?

2. The Pillsbury Doughboy is way too happy...
considering he doesn't have a dick.

3. People who are willing to get off their ass
to search the entire room for the damn TV
remote because they refuse to walk to the
TV & change it manually!!

4. When people say..."Oh, you just want to
have your cake & eat it, too." Fuck off!! What
good is a damn piece of cake if you can't eat
it? What should I do--eat someone else's
piece of cake instead?!?!

5. When people say..."It's always the last
place you look." No Shit!! Why the fuck would
you keep looking for it after you have already
found it?!?! Do people do this? Who & where
are they?

6. When people say, while watching a movie...
"Did you see that?" No, dicknose, I paid $7.50
to come to a theater & stare at the fucking
ceiling! What did you come here for?

7. The radio ad..."Hi, I'm Stevie Wonder. Don't
drink & drive. I don't." I hope you don't drive
sober either, Stevie, because if you haven't
forgotten -- you're blind!!

8. People who ask..."Can I ask you a question?"
Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya
buddy?

9. When something is "new & improved", which is
it? If it's new, then there has never been any-
thing before it. If it's an improvement, then
there must have been something before it!

10. When a cop pulls you over & then asks if you
know how fast you were going.You should know,
asshole...you're the one that fucking pulled me
over!!!


Well, there is one more thing that really fucking
bugs me...chain letters!! Who the hell thinks
that by annoying other people with stupid mail
with no meaning that that will grant you a wish
or make your long lost love fall into your arms?
Bull shit!! I am so sure that by breaking a stupid
chain letter, the computer GODS are going to curse
me!! What a crock of shit!!

[teapeebubbles]

all these new bds on ihub annoy me!

[j.c.]

Lol... this ought to be a hot board...
Sometimes kizzazz 2faced whiney folks...
But mostly... those nothing substantial "grub" posts!
Grub, btw