OK, I'll correct myself: you most definitely do not grasp the technological concepts. It's called mechanical engineering, physics and computer simulation.
They know enough to calculate the kinetic energy of a bullet. They understand material properties like strength, toughness, elasticity etc. quite well enough to know how they all work together and what specifications are required to be able to stop a bullet. (If you doubt this sort of computation is possible, just how exactly do you think we can send a payload all the way to Mars and get it in at exactly the right angle of descent so that the atmosphere (what traces of it there are on Mars) provide sufficient braking to slow it enough to allow the parachutes, balloons etc to enable it to land intact. Do you think that complex operations cannot be done by using computer simulations to predict in advance what things will do? Last I heard this is the twenty-first century. It is quite remarkable the difficulty and complexity of tasks that can be planned and accomplished when you are just concerned with what actually works as opposed to just winning "points".
The "problem" is not whether or not spider silk has good enough qualities to make a better bulletproof vest. The problem is how to get enough spider silk to make one at a reasonable price.