I can not only understand that, but identify with it as well! LOL,
IMVHO... if he were my best friend, I would offer him 500 bucks and tell him to forget about ever finding the love of his dreams.
Don't marry it, just rent it for awhile with a renewable option!!
"Oh Painful memories coming to visit,
Remind me to run should I conger up Daphne.
Where is my best friend, I need him to slap me!"