Politically Correct Terms For Males
* He does not have a beer gut; He develops a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.
* He is not quiet; He is a CONVERSATIONAL MINIMALIST.
* He does not have a fabulous rear end; He has achieved BUTTOCKS PERFECTION.
* He is not stupid; He suffers from MINIMAL CRANIAL DEVELOPMENT.
* He does not get lost all the time; He discovers ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.
* He is not balding; He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION.
* You do not buy him a drink; You initiate an ALCOHOL-FOR-CONVERSATION EXCHANGE.
* He does not fart and belch; He is GASTRONOMICALLY EXPRESSIVE.
* His jeans are not too tight; He is ANATOMICALLY UNDERCIRCULATED.
* He is not a redneck; He is a GENETICALLY-RELATED AMERICAN.
* You do not kiss him; you become FACIALLY CONJOINED.
* He is not a cradle robber; He prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS.
* He does not get falling-down drunk; He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL.
* He does not act like a total ass; He develops A CASE OF RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.
* He is not short; He is ANATOMICALLY COMPACT.
* He does not have a rich daddy; He is a RECIPIENT OF PARENTAL ASSET INFUSION.
* He does not constantly talk about cars; He has a VEHICULAR ADDICTION.
* He does not have a hot body; He is PHYSICALLY COMBUSTIBLE.
* He is not unsophisticated; He is SOCIALLY MALFORMED.
* He does not eat like a pig; He suffers from REVERSE BULIMIA.
* He does not hog the blankets; He is THERMALLY UNAPPRECIATIVE.
* He is not a sex machine; he is ROMANTICALLY AUTOMATED.
* He is not a male chauvinist pig; he has SWINE EMPATHY.
* You do not undress him with your eyes; You have AN INTROSPECTIVE PORNOGRAPHIC MOMENT.
* He is not afraid of commitment; he is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED.
#board-2412
"We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, therefore, is not an act, but a habit." - Aristotle
