Any Good Jokes?

[PappaJohn]

Sports comments:

Here are some comments made by sports commentators that they might
wish to take back:

1. Weightlifting commentator at the Olympic Snatch and Jerk Event:
"This is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning during her
warm-up and it was amazing."

2. Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator: "This is really a lovely horse
and I speak from personal experience since I once mounted her mother."

3. Grand Prix Race Announcer: "The lead car is absolutely, truly unique,
except for the one behind it which is exactly identical to the one in
front of the similar one in back."

4. Greg Norman, Pro Golfer: "I owe a lot to my parents, especially my
mother and father."

5. Ringside Boxing Analyst: "Sure there have been injuries and even some
deaths in boxing - but none of them were really that serious."

6. Baseball announcer: "If history repeats itself, I should think we can
expect the same thing again."

7. Basketball analyst: "He dribbles a lot and the opposition doesn't
like it. In fact you can see it all over their faces."

8. At a trophy ceremony BBC TV Boat Race 1988: "Ah, isn't that nice, the
wife of the Cambridge president is hugging the cox of the Oxford crew."

9. Metro Radio, College Football: "Julian Dicks is everywhere.
It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field."

10. US Open TV Commentator: "One of the reasons Arnie Palmer is playing
so well is that, before each final round, his wife takes out his balls
and kisses them. Oh my God, what have I just said?"

And: Dan Dierdorf on Monday Night Football; "The team that scores the most points wins the game!"