So the young gold-digger wants a 500K lifestyle and can’t find anything beyond 250K suckers. There’s a number of solutions.
The arithmetic’s simple enough. She needs to start earning 250K. This will help in more ways than the obvious: she will not only “top up” her deficient mate, but in the process she’ll alter her position from parasite to partner. Like attracts like. Their union will be equitable. As a bonus, both being high achievers will augment their relationship with something they have in common.
Money seems to have “directional imbalance.” For most people, it seems to “go” much easier than it “comes.” Her current proposal is to enter a marriage where her husband is responsible for the earning and she’ll handle the spending. Nice work, if you can find it. Trouble is, she’s overlooking some basic facts.
To accumulate wealth, one must negotiate a gauntlet of obstacles successfully: taxes, litigation, market reversals, thieves, friends, relatives, charities, as well as good causes with their hands out. And let’s not forget spouses too. High achievers soon develop radar that’s highly sensitive to these distractions. Warned early, their defences deploy fully. Our young gold-digger must overcome this formidable obstacle. So far, she hasn’t succeeded.
She’s on the wrong side of the fence. She’s on the attack. The man she want’s is defending. He sees her as an advisory. (And he’s right.) Her goals and his are opposites. For her plan to succeed, she needs to be standing at his side combating the same opposition. Her main challenge is getting there.
She mentioned certain career choices: Doctor, Lawyer, and Financier. All these professions place high demands on their members during both preparation and practice. This sacrifice is something they share in common. Think of it as a bond joining them together. A person is either an insider or an outsider. The young gold-digger is outside. However, she’s not locked out forever. She can enter: talent, effort, and sacrifice are the keys.
By the tone of her message, she want’s a map to some secret tunnel leading to the inside. There isn’t one. But there’s yet another approach. It works too.
Love the person instead of the wallet. Build a life together. Support one another. Be prepared for “richer or poorer.” Without the foundation of a great relationship, the money’s meaningless anyway, so why bother perusing it? What will it bring? Nothing of real value.
If she finds a partner who will travel down life’s path by her side, share both the triumphs and the setbacks, sees her beauty long after everyone else sees it faded, and views her spirit as precious, she’ll have found a treasure more valuable than gold. If after finding this, she still wants wealth too, then let them work together in acquiring it. It’ll be another thing they can share.
I have the feeling my words would be wasted on a twenty-five year old.
Just my thoughts.
Cheers, PW.
AI
