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Wednesday, 02/11/2004 3:13:28 AM

Wednesday, February 11, 2004 3:13:28 AM

Post# of 32126
Things I learned since Isabel
=======================

My son, who lives in the Hampton Roads area of Virginia, was
affected by hurricane Isabel. Power to his area was restored a
bit over 2 weeks after the storm. His wit still remains as he
writes...

Things I learned since Isabel...

Coffee and frozen pizzas can be made on a BBQ grill.

No matter how many times you flick the switch, lights don't
work without electricity.

My car gets 23.21675 miles per gallon, EXACTLY (you can ask
the people in line who helped me push it.)

Kids can survive 4 days or longer without a video game
controller in their hands.

Cats are even more annoying without power.

He who has the biggest generator wins.

Women can actually survive without doing their hair (you just
wish they weren't around you.)

A new method of non-lethal torture: showers without hot water.

Dominion Virginia Power and VDOT are the same company (not
really but their ability to plan are strikingly similar).

There are a lot more stars in the sky than most people thought.

TV is an addiction and the withdrawal symptoms are painful.

A 7-pound bag of ice will chill six 12-ounce Budweisers to a drinkable
temperature in 11 minutes, and still keep a 14-pound turkey
frozen for 8 more hours.

There sure are a lot of trees around here!

Flood plane drawings on some mortgage documents were seriously
wrong.

Contrary to the beliefs of most natives in Hampton Roads, speed
limits on roads without traffic lights do not increase.

Aluminum siding, while aesthetically pleasing, is definitely not
required.

"Just because you're over 35 doesn't mean you can stay out as
late as you want." (At least that's what the Hampton cops told
me during curfew stop.)

Crickets can increase their volume to overcome the sound of 14
generators.

People will get into a line that has already formed without
having any idea what the line is for.

When required, a Lincoln Continental will float; doesn't steer
well but floats just the same.

Some things do keep the mailman from his appointed rounds.

Telemarketers function no matter what the weather is doing.

Cell phones work when land lines are down, but only as long as
the battery remains charged.

Twenty-seven of your neighbors are fed from a different transformer than
you, and they are quick to point that out!

Hampers were not made to contain such a volume.

If I owned a store that sold only ice, chainsaws, gas and
generators...I'd be rich.

The price of a can of soup rises 200% in a storm.

Your water front property can quickly become someone else's
fishing hole.

Tree service companies are underappreciated.

I've learned what happens when you make fun of another state's
blackout.

MATH 101: 30 days in a month, minus 6 days without power equals a
30% higher electric bill ???

Drywall is a compound word, take away the :dry" part and it's
worthless.

I can walk a lot farther than I thought.

A 7-mile stretch of "new" road by the Coliseum doesn't drain
properly...but wait, I learned that 2 months ago.

Water will indeed fill the Midtown Tunnel if the floodgates
aren't shut during a flood. I was pretty sure that was true,
but it has now been proven.


~A MountainWings Original by subscriber Carmela M. Saul's son J~


http://www.mountainwings.com/past/4042.htm

Prepare to Fly - Let MountainWings.com help lift YOU over the Mountains of Life




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~ Ivan Howes

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