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Friday, December 01, 2023 4:24:52 PM
December 1
18 months since diagnosis and here I am and here I intend to stay. Writing about it helps me to process everything and is a form of therapy. It's hard to be so open and vulnerable particularly when I have always been a very private person not wanting to speak about myself or my nearest and dearest. It's also difficult at times to put into words the feelings that arise when you are faced with a diagnosis such as mine. The majority of the time I push it to the back of my mind.
I have now had 5 DCVAX-L vaccinations. When I go to London for my vaccine I am really happy to be able to get this treatment but each time it's a reminder that I am going to be battling for survival for the rest of my days. That's OK. I have accepted this. There are so many others who suffer on a daily basis and who lose loved ones. It's not lost on me that mine is just another story in a sea of sad stories.
But I don't feel sad today, I feel content. I am grateful to be alive, I am lucky to be loved, I am fortunate to feel healthy, I am blessed to be getting this vaccine, I am thankful to have so much support. Life can be beautiful.
My next vaccine will be in March next year. That will be vaccine number 6.
From then it will be a vaccine every 6 months. A booster. This is something to think about in the New Year when we will do a big push to raise the amount we aimed for in the beginning. Fundraising has slowed down in the last few months but it must keep pushing forward and it will.
It is almost a year since we began our fundraising campaign (1 Dec 2022) and what a year it has been. A total rollercoaster ride of emotions both positive and negative, tears and laughter, fear and hope, happiness and sadness but above all a year of gratitude and appreciation. Without the continued support of everyone that has taken the time to read my story, donate to my cause, fund-raise on my behalf I would not be in the position I am in now. So thank you everyone we are forever grateful.
For now it is time to focus on the weeks ahead and the craziness of Christmas and school plays and Santa coming to visit. The best distraction.
https://www.gofundme.com/f/funding-for-tracy
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