I refuse to go to the gym.
It's a form of resistance training.
My grandson ties shoelaces at the playground for free.
It's a knot-for-profit venture.
It took me forever to find my TV controller.
It was in a remote location again.
I used to get to work early, but then stopped.
It always seemed to make the workday seem longer.
A woman goes to the doctor and says
"Doctor I want to have a baby but my husband is adamant that he doesn't want any children. What can I do?"
The doctor tells her that the next time she goes to have sex with her husband, take a sewing needle and poke holes in the tip of the condom.
A few days later the woman goes back to the doctor and says, "Doctor it didn't work, after I poked holes in the condom my husband didn't want to have sex anymore.
The doctor says, "Yes I just saw him earlier. Next time do it before you put the condom on him."
That'll teach the prick.
