Any Good Jokes?

[PappaJohn]

I never checked the authenticity of the job ap...just cut and pasted from http://www.funclown.com/jobapp.htm. It reminded me of the way I fill out some forms on the internet when I don't care to be inundated with sales calls.

Phone: YES or 555.1212

Email: [e-mail]



Speaking of sales calls:

http://thebesthumor.com/jokes/work/telegonebad.php

Telephone Solicitation Gone Bad

I was at home the other night in the middle of my dinner when the phone rang.

ME: Hello.

A T & T: Hello, this is A T & T ...

ME: Is this A T & T?

A T & T: Yes, this is A T & T ...

ME: This is A T & T?

A T & T: Yes, this is A T & T ...

ME: Is this A T & T?

A T & T: Yes! This is A T & T, may I speak to Mr.Byron, please?

ME: May I ask who is calling?

A T & T: This is A T & T.

ME: Ok, hold on.

At this point I put the phone down for a solid 5 minutes thinking that, surely, this person would have hung up the phone. I ate my salad. Much to my surprise, when I picked up the receiver, they were still waiting.

ME: Hello?

A T & T: Is this Mr. Byron?

ME: May I ask who is calling, please?

A T & T: Yes, this is A T & T ...

ME: This is A T & T?

A T & T: Yes, this is A T & T ...

ME: The phone company?

A T & T: Yes, sir.

ME: I thought you said this was A T & T.

A T & T: Yes, sir, we are a phone company.

ME: I already have a phone.

A T & T: We aren't selling phones today, Mr. Byron. We would like to offer you 10 cents a minute, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.

ME: Now, that's 10 cents a minute, 24 hours a day?

A T & T: (getting a little excited at this point by my interest) Yes, sir, that's right! 24 hours a day!

ME: 7 days a week?

A T & T: That's right.

ME: 365 days a year?

A T & T: Yes, sir.

ME: I am definitely interested in that! Wow!!! ! That's amazing!

A T & T: We think so!

ME: That's quite a sum of money!

A T & T: Yes, sir, it's amazing how it adds up.

ME: Ok, so will you send me checks weekly, monthly or just one big one at the end of the year for the full $52,560; and if you send an annual check, can I get a cash advance?

A T & T: Excuse me?

ME: You know, the 10 cents a minute.

A T & T: What are you talking about?

ME: You said you'd give me 10 cents a minute, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. That comes to $144 per day, $1008 per week and $52,560 per year. I'm just interested in knowing how you will be making payment.

A T & T: Oh, no, sir. I didn't mean we'd be paying you. You pay us 10 cents a minute.

ME: Wait a minute, how do you figure that by saying that you'll give me 10 cents a minute, that I'll give YOU 10 cents a minute? Is this some kind of subliminal telemarketing scheme? I've read about things like this in the Enquirer, you know.

A T & T: No, sir, we are offering 10 cents a minute for ...

ME: THERE YOU GO AGAIN! Can I speak to a supervisor please?

A T & T: Sir, I don't think that is necessary.

ME: I insist on speaking to a supervisor!

A T & T: Yes, Mr. Byron. Please hold.

At this point, I begin trying to finish my dinner.

SUPERVISOR: Mr. Byron?

ME: Yeth?

SUPERVISOR: I understand you are not quite understanding our 10 cents a minute program.

ME: Id thish Ath Teeth & Teeth?

SUPERVISOR: Yes, sir, it sure is.

ME: (I had to swallow before I choked on my food. It was all I could do to suppress my laughter and I had to be careful not to produce a snort) No, actually, I was just waiting for someone to get back to me so that I could sign up for the plan.

SUPERVISOR: Ok, no problem, I'll transfer you back to the person who was helping you.

ME: Thank you.

I was on hold once again and managed a few more mouthfuls. I need to end this conversation. Suddenly, there was an aggravated but polite voice at the other end of the phone.

A T & T: Hello, Mr. Byron, I understand that you are interested in signing up for our plan?

ME: No, but I was wondering - do you have that "Friends and Family" thing because I'm an only child and I'd really like to have a little brother...

A T & T: click........