People I live with are hiding my shit. The two most effective hiding places to date: 1) out in the open 2) where I last left it Creepy kid: I see dead people Me: I see people I want dead Creepy kid: But they don't know they're dead Me: [racks shotgun] Same Is your refrigerator running? Because I might vote for it. Damn, my printer is so needy. Always asking for more paper or more ink. I give and give and then it tells me it doesn't think we have a connection. I’ve never learned anything from a good decision.