Most of my old routines don't work any more because every caller is now a robot, and it's hard to make robots cry.
I've come up with a solution. I push whatever number gets me to the human. I engage the human briefly as if I were interested in the cruise/solar energy/credit card/police benevolent association. Then I announce that this is a test and I'm a secret customer, paid by their employer to receive, rate and critique the sales force. Then I start in on their abysmal sales technique. I could barely understand their slurred speech and they only thinly disguised the fact they were reading from a script. With an accent like that, how do they expect to be a successful seller in an English-speaking country? Etc.
I just keep building and getting louder. And unlike my other routines, they don't hang up. They just take it and take it. Because if they were smart enough to see through my routine, they'd be smart enough to get a real job.
I feel amazing. And you can too.
