The Confessional

[teapeebubbles]

The Fart Chart
1. AMBITIOUS : Always ready for a fart
2. AMIABLE : Likes to smell others' farts
3. ANTI-SOCIAL : Excuses himself and farts in private
4. AQUATIC : Farts in bath, then breaks bubbles with
toes
5. ATHLETIC : Jumps in the air, farts 3 times, and
kicks his heels 3 times
6. BEWILDERED : Can't tell his own fart from others
7. BIG BULLY : Farts louder than others
8. CARELESS : Farts in church
9. CHILDISH : Farts and then giggles
10. CLEVER : Farts and coughs at the same time
11. CONCEITED : Thinks he can fart the loudest
12. CONFUSED : Face is so much like an ass, fart can't
tell which way to go
13. CUTE : Smells your farts and then tells you what
you were eating
14. DAMNED MEAN : Farts and then pulls the covers over
his wife's head
15. DISHONEST : Farts and then blames the dog
16. DISAPPOINTED : Fart doesn't smell
17. DUMB : Enjoys other farts, thinks they are his own
18. ENVIRONMENTALIST : Farts regularly but is concerned
about the pollution
19. FOOLISH : Suppresses a fart for hours
20. FRESH GUY : Jumps in front of you and then farts
21. GROUCH : Grumbles when ladies fart
22. HONEST : Admits he farted but offers a good medical
reason
23. IMPUDENT : Farts out aloud and then laughs
24. LAZY : Just fizzles
25. MASOCHIST : Farts in the bath tub and tries to bite
the bubbles
26. MISERABLE : Can't fart at all
27. MUSICAL : Tenor or Bass, Clear as a bell, smells like
shit and sounds like hell
28. NERVOUS : Stops in the middle of a fart
29. PROUD : Thinks his farts are exceptionally pleasant
30. SADIST : Farts in bed, then fluffs the covers
31. SCIENTIFIC : Bottles his farts
32. SENSITIVE : Farts and then starts crying
33. SHY : Blushes when he farts silently
34. SLOB : Farts and stains his underwear
35. SMART ALEC : Farts when ladies are present
36. SNEAKY : Farts and blames it on the dog
37. STINGY : Belches to save his ass-hole
38. STRATEGIC : Conceals his fart by loud laughter
39. THRIFTY : One who always has farts in reserve
40. TIMID : Jumps when he farts
41. UNFORTUNATE : Tries to fart but shits himself
42. VAIN PERSON : One who loves the smell of his own fart
43. WHIMPY : Farts at the slightest exertion
44. WISE GUY : Farts and asks who shit Nancy