I believe our gamble to let it ride will pay off Wow, 3son i must agree that sounds just like my father, conditional love, if I don't do what he wants then he doesn't help me. Im 45 years old and he treats me like I am 16 and don't know anything. He holds things over my head especially money to control me, my ex-husband helped me see these things, I knew he was mean and miserable but didn't realize how controlling he was because I grew up that way. If he does help me in any way financially, fixing my car or something needed for my house he implies that he has to take care of me and that isn't his job and has have a ton of money. I have 4 children and if they needed something because they couldn't afford it and I had the money to help I would because they are my children and I love them and I would never make them feel like they were a burden. I am on a break from work because I have severe depression and anxiety and I know you shouldn't blame people for what is wrong with you but I see now how my fathers mean, nasty personality has made me how I am, I have very low self esteem, no confidence and its because I never got any praise, compliments, encouragement or support because I was not aloud to make any decisions because if he didn't agree with them, it didn't happen.He will never see the joy of seeing his children or grandchildren jumping for joy to see him.Its weird when idcc has given so much money to him and he gave out aggravation and bull.
Now my mother is ill and needs my help with her and to take care and I feel so horrible because I feel like I don't love him, I will take care of my parents because that is my duty as their child. Deep down I know that I am a good and caring person, lots of people tell me but I hold such anger towards my father that I feel like I am a horrible person.
