Any Good Jokes?

[SHORENUFFSTUFF]

George Carlin asked why?

How come wrong numbers are never busy?

Does killing time damage eternity?

Why is it that night falls but day breaks?

Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

Can you buy an entire chess set in a pawn-shop?

How can there be self-help "groups"?

I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.

Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?

How many weeks are there in a light year?