Alright folks, first off, I'd like to thank the Academy for awarding me as your new moderator of this board. As you know, it's just an honor to be nominated. The other nominees were equally worthy, and I'm sure we'll see more of them in the future.
Now, on to the meat.....
I have been working undercover as a secret spy at the headquarters of Bashers Inc. For 15 years now I have had to suck up to Janice Shell. I've had to get her coffee. Cut the crust off her sandwiches. Pretend to like her artwork. Just so I could one day rise to this position. Well here I am and it's time to now share the truth.
I am really a huge CMKXer. I own hundreds of millions of shares of CMKX and now that we are about to get paid our due, I can come forth and share the truth. I was only made moderator in return for me not sharing the wealth of information I have on the bashers, and now that they know their goose is about to be cooked I can finally come clean. Compare this to being a prisoner of war right before the Allied forces move in. I have been promoted in exchange for my silence, but they will not silence me!
I have already been contacted by the offices of the new Pope about discussions of a settlement. There are things working in the background that I cannot yet share due to top national treason laws, but the day will come soon.
So, come on out of the hiding you proud CMKXers! We shall not hide in the shadows any longer! Lets bring this board back to the once greatest board on Ihub! We will get what we deserve!
P.S. Janice Shell has gotten so apathetic, she doesn't even read this board any longer. She has minions who alert her to when she needs to throw an ancillary post on here. I believe those who work for her now realize it is futile to even tell her about this post. So come forth and post your allegiance. Let me know I've reached you. Let me know you haven't given up hope. Lets show Ihub this board still matters.
Just my opinion, of course.
