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HIDE AND SEEK
A blonde and her boyfriend were setting at home one night and became bored.
"Hey, let's play a game" she said.
"What game?" was his bored reply.
"Let's play hide'n'seek. I'll give you a blow-job if you can find me."
"What if I can't find you?"
"I'll be behind the piano."
MAN AND WOMAN
WOMAN: What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?
MAN: Definitely not!
WOMAN: Why not - don't you like being married?
MAN: Of course I do.
WOMAN: Then why wouldn't you remarry?
MAN: Okay, I'd get married again.
WOMAN: You would? (with a hurtful look on her face)
MAN: (makes audible groan)
WOMAN: Would you sleep with her in our bed?
MAN: Where else would we sleep?
WOMAN: Would you put away my pictures, and replace them with pictures of her?
MAN: That would seem like the proper thing to do.
WOMAN: And would you let her use my golf clubs?
MAN: She can't use them; she's left-handed.
WOMAN: - - - silence - - -
MAN: Shit.
Save the Instructions...
A little old lady, well into her eighties, slowly enters the front door of an erotic sex shop. Obviously very unstable on her feet, she shakily hobbles the few feet across the store to the counter.
Finally arriving at the counter and grabbing it for support, she asks the sales clerk: "Ddddooo youuuu hhhave dddddildosss?"
The clerk, politely trying not to burst out laughing, replies: "Yes we do have dildos. Actually we carry many models."
The old woman then asks: "Dddddoooo yyyouuuu hhhave aaa ppppinkk one, tttenn inchessss lllong aaandd aabboutt tttwoo inchesss thththiiickkk?"
The clerk responds, "Yes we do."
"Ccccccannnn yyyyouuuu tttelll mmmmeeee hhhhowwww ttttoooo ttturrrnnn ttthe fffuucccckkkkinggg ttthingggg offffff?
I like that girl swallowing or not at least she's doing the deed YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:)
that's the scary part my imagination runs wild
donate what?
A woman was shaking out a rug on the balcony of her 17th floor condominium when a sudden gust of wind blew her over the railing. "Damn, that was stupid," she thought as she fell. "What a way to die."
As she passed the 14th floor, a man standing at his railing caught her in his arms.
While she looked at him in disbelieving gratitude, he asked, "Do you suck?"
"No!" she shrieked, aghast.
So, he dropped her.
As she passed the 12th floor, another man reached out and caught her. "Do you screw?" he asked.
"Of course not!" she exclaimed before she could stop herself.
He dropped her, too.
The poor woman prayed to God for one more chance. As luck would have it, she was caught a third time, by a man on the eighth floor. "I suck! I screw!" she screamed in panic.
"Slut!" he said, and dropped her.
oh I did I sent it to a few friends thanks:)
that was funny I thought that one woman was going to choke on her salad
who are you LOL!!!!!!
hope you're having a good weekend
good night teapeebubbles
mean not you never LOL
how are you tonight
Too funny...
My five-year old students are learning to read.
Yesterday one of them pointed at a picture in a zoo book and said, "Look at this! It's a frickin' elephant!"
I took a deep breath, then asked..."What did you call it?"
"It's a frickin' elephant! It says so on the picture!"
And so it does...
" A f r i c a n Elephant "
Hooked on phonics! Ain't it wonderful?
A man breaks into a house to look for money and guns inside, he finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed
and ties him to a chair. While tying the homeowner's wife to the bed the convict gets on top of
her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom.
While he's in there, the husband whispers over to his wife: 'Listen, this guy is an escaped convict. Look at his clothes! He's
probably spent a lot of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don't resist,
don't complain..do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how he nauseates you. This guy is obviously very dangerous. If he
gets angry, he'll kill us both. Be strong, honey. I love you!'
His wife responds: 'He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me that he's gay, thinks you're cute,
and asked if we had any Vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I Love you, too.'
ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
did the doctor tell you to be nicer to truckers
she's pretty but can't sing and a f@@ked up attitue
or maybe a new weapon
it's alive wish it were at .03
I'm not 50 yet
good afternoon young lady
I saw that article even Flynt has his hand out for bailout money.
http://sayanythingblog.com/entry/larry_flynt_wants_government_bailout_for_porn/
ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww nasty
he's soup material
thanks DUCKY he's been my mentor in the mensroom LOL!!!!!!
but it started with a 3
he's the master perv LOL
thanks bro I'll photobucket it today
thanks Larry I thought I was being locked out
morning everyone is anyone having problems with the fotolink
MODERN APPLICATIONS
Genetic Engineering, is the key to a brighter future for both consumers and industry.
BIOENGINEERED SPIDER SILKS HAVE TREMENDOUS POTENTIAL IN THE MARKET PLACE FOR HIGH STRENGTH, LIGHT-WEIGHT MATERIALS SUCH AS:
Bulletproof vests, parachute cords, suspension cables, wear-resistant shoes
and clothing, seat belts, rust-free bumpers for automobiles,
artificial tendons and ligaments
Scientists have previously suggested that a mere pencil-thick strand of silk
could actually stop a Boeing 747 in mid flight.
some old news out last may
Kraig Biocraft Laboratories, Inc. Develops Synthetic Enzyme
DNA Sequence for New Enzyme is Mapped
In Vitro Testing of the Enzyme's Ability to Cleave the Targeted DNA to Begin This Summer
http://stockupticks.com/profiles/5-20-08.html
I'll e-mail a few friend about this one. It looks like it could be a very nice play
Hey Monk
I like science almost as much as the mensroom.
The reason why I like thier logo is because I believe that also.