When I see someone crying, I always ask if it's because of their haircut.
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Yes, I remember Mary Catherine. She was a stripper and had a bush the size of Big Ragu on Laverne & Shirley.
She put a Shamwow in her G-string, so she could polish the stripper-pole as she danced.
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Congratulations on your new book!
Unfortunately, some critics say, the only way your book will fly off the shelves is if a tornado hits a Walmart:
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A long time? Do you realize we've been posting on IHUB for a combined total of 41 years?
Time disappears faster than a hamster with a hacksaw.
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Au contraire, PlusOne was given the royal treatment this week, when England issued a PlusOne postage stamp:
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Did you know Clem recently wrote a book about PlusOne?
Funny thing is... it starts with Chapter 11.
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To get extras like that, you'd have to sign-up for IHUB Ultimate for only $249 a month:
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If you give them your info, you'll soon encounter these two jumos:
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Apparently everyone here is on a great vacation in Tuscany, eating white truffle gelato, from all the money they made with PlusOne 'coins'.
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You have 2 hot babes knockin' on your door every day, who can't afford to buy a dozen eggs?
Seems to me that you could trade a few eggs for a little freestyle orifice-probing, or at least ask them to milk your ferret.
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Before you start Round Two of smoking that jazz cabbage in your lucky skull-bong, perhaps you would disclose your choice for replacing the Big Red Button:
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And, a Happy Father's Day to everyone, although I think some IHUBBERS got into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn't watching.
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Thanks. Since it's Father's Day, I thought I'd make a moment of conception joke.
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It is generally believed that the 90-day incubation period for an 'active member' begins at the actual moment of conception.
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Yes, asking IHUB to ditch the red mailbox icon was like asking Steve Jobs to ditch the black turtleneck.
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Correct! The gigantic RED UPDATE button didn't have to be so large. It could've been ¼ the size, except for one thing:
It's size had to be large enough to hide the Premium Member Trophy button underneath it.
Its red glow fills the page like a silent-but-deadly fart fills a room with no windows.
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I'm appalled that the Premium Member banner contains a red, loving-cup trophy to the left:
Paid members get a trophy, and we're shunned like an Amish kid with a nipple-ring.
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And here's what IHUB Search looked like 20 years ago:
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Correct. The IHUB pages now glow brighter than enriched uranium.
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Yes, the only time Americans use the metric system is when they're buying or selling cocaine.
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Yes, this PlusOne experience is like a Eugene O'Neill play with more hot-dog cannons.
BTW, I don't get offended easily, but did you know the serving size on Oreos is 2 cookies? What kind of absolute BS is this?
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Don't worry. You were paranoid when you said, I just figured they were trying to get rid of the chaff like me.
They weren't trying to get rid of you. But, that part about the chaff...
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Correct, sir. It's a shame that an esteemed Member such as Janice, must suffer a Red Update box, just because she hasn't reached deep into her coin-purse to pay for an exorbitant Premium plan.
Unfortunately, this is the lack of respect she gets after years of IHUB loyalty and quality posts - such as dutifully promoting her PlusOne® Bonus Links - and in color for the Holidays too!
They owe her an apology and 3 pounds of my Classic Cashews, plus a theater-size box of Jujubes.
My luscious nuts get passed around like a joint at the Willy Nelson estate.
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Of course you couldn't see it. You're in the same basket as me:
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Yes, we're treated with all the status of a pork-chop at the Wailing Wall.
https://investorshub.advfn.com/boards/read_msg.aspx?message_id=169106779
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Although we lesser mortals are forced to see that large, Red Upgrade button, Premium Members see this instead: , announcing their elevated status.
IHUB treats Non-Premium members with all the respect that they would a stewardess on a drunken spring-break charter flight to Cancun.
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Good for him! Today he found out that he could go to a store, buy food uncooked, and go home and cook it himself.
Also, that he should also take the plastic-covering off those individually-wrapped slices of cheese for an especially good taste.
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As Zardiw used to say, When the Coins go down, the pants go brown.
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Yes, when this PlusOne debacle is over, it will cause more finger-pointing than a nude Superman sighting in Beijing.
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Go to the PlusOneCoin Showcase and claim .01 of a worthless invisible 'coin'.
Many here would rather pick out caskets for their parents than miss out on a free 'coin'.
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Once a year? Experts suggest that, for married couples, it's more like once every 10 years - and only on a birthday!
I'd like to stay and chit-chat, but I'm busy. Amazon just delivered two 55-gallon drums of baby-formula to me.
I need the formula to make my kale and bee-pollen smoothies every morning.
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You think that's annoying? Here's the ads we had to deal with a few years ago:
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International Head Day? You should be their Spokesman, since you once claimed you could identify any pornstar by the back of her head.
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You had some great stories. But, the funniest was your New Years Eve experience, when you woke up on a deflated air-mattress, spooning with a fat guy in a leopard-print man-thong, who looked like Ted Cruz.
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Yes, you always had an obsession with names.
I remember your suggestion to rename the IHUB Admins the "Fun Tampons", because they impede the flow of good times.
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During labor, the pain is so great that a woman can almost imagine what a man feels when he only gets a .01 PlusOne coin from the Faucet.
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When 'coins' ran low during Clem's reign, these coin-drip bags were available on Amazon:
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Yes, I can see that you're truly distraught because you haven't made a complaint about that giant, red Upgrade To Real-Time button yet.
It may be the anti-depressants talking, but I'm feeling somewhat optimistic about seeing faucets again.
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Correct, ma'am. Just because you call yourself a 'coin', doesn't mean you're an actual coin.
Just because you spend most of your time in the missionary position, doesn't make you a missionary.
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