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You Know You're A Trader When: RSS Feed

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Moderator SteelWill
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Thought of this while fixing dinner for the wife and I. I was reflecting on how much I learned recently at Bill Panetta's Board. Thought about how little I understood a week ago. About how much I still did not understand. Everyone was speaking a different language, almost impossible to interpret by context. There wasn't enough words in a sentence to give you a clue. To myself I said, you'll know you're becoming a Trader when you understand the Jive. And that led me to one of my favorite comedians out of Atlanta, Jeff Foxworthy: "You might be a redneck if.....": The same applies to TRADERS!!! I'll Start, Yawl finish: Anything that follows the THEME that YOU might/could/must be/know you're a TRADER/REDNECK/TREEHUGGER...., whatever as long as it's in reasonable taste, but most of all funny or ironic is welcome. We want to amuse our friends in the iHUB community and posts that hit closest to the heart of that group will probably be the most appreciated. Happy Trading to All! MORE ON THE INSPIRATION FOR THIS BOARD Some Current Examples of PURE Foxworthy: You Might Be A Redneck if... You think a stock tip is advice on worming' your hogs. At least one dog slept in your bed on your wedding night. You met your wife at a family reunion. You think Genitalia is an Italian airline. Your sister is the third generation of women in your family to conceive a baby as a result of an alien abduction. If you can burp and say your name at the same time, you're shur'nuff a redneck. You think Possum is "The Other White Meat" You hooked up with your present girlfriend as a result of a message on the wall of the mens' room at the Flying J Truck Stop. You think a quarter horse is a ride out in front of the Wal-Mart. You think there's nothin wrong with incest as long as you keep it in the family. You and your dog use the same tree. You believe dual air bags refer to your wife and mother-in-law. And they go on and on. For more, visit: http://www.fortogden.com/foredneck.html I do not believe Jeff was the originator of the redneck jokes. In the early 80's I lived in Chattanooga, TN and there was a columnist out of Atlanta that did a piece routinely in our newspaper about southern rednecks, but I don't recall it being Jeff. Of course he could have changed his name. Biography Jeff Foxworthy's wry Southern humor made him one of the most popular standup comedians of the '90s. Foxworthy grew up in Atlanta and was working for IBM when he tried standup on a dare. Before long, he'd quit his job to pursue comedy full-time. His material concentrated mainly on family situations, but it was his affectionate jabs at Southern rednecks (or the "gloriously unsophisticated") that catapulted ... Read MoreJeff Foxworthy's wry Southern humor made him one of the most popular standup comedians of the '90s. Foxworthy grew up in Atlanta and was working for IBM when he tried standup on a dare. Before long, he'd quit his job to pursue comedy full-time. His material concentrated mainly on family situations, but it was his affectionate jabs at Southern rednecks (or the "gloriously unsophisticated") that catapulted him to stardom. Originally released on Laughing Hyena in 1993, You Might Be a Redneck If... became a word-of-mouth hit, and Warner Bros. bought his contract in 1994. With their added promotional muscle, You Might Be a Redneck If... climbed to number three on the country album charts in 1995, and eventually sold over four million copies, making it the biggest-selling comedy album of all time. His follow-up album, Games Rednecks Play, appeared later in 1995 and went to number two on the country charts, also crossing over to the pop Top Ten; it sold over two million copies. Foxworthy was an undeniably hot commodity, and ABC offered him his own sitcom in 1995. Ratings for The Jeff Foxworthy Show were disappointing, but when ABC took a pass, NBC picked up the show for an additional season; it was canceled in 1997. Meanwhile, Foxworthy branched out into musical satire on 1996's Crank It Up: The Music Album, which went gold and once again made the country Top Five. He returned to standup on the 1998 live album Totally Committed, another country Top Ten hit. Foxworthy subsequently moved over to DreamWorks, where he debuted with 2000's Big Funny. That same year, he teamed up with Bill Engvall, Ron White, and Larry the Cable Guy for the hugely popular Blue Collar Comedy Tour, which spawned an album of highlights and, in 2003, an accompanying concert film. ~ Steve Huey, All Music Guide For those interested, Foxworthy's website is: http://www.jefffoxworthy.com/comedy/jod/index.shtml
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