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LOL... that was good..
Really though, how can i manage a satire board when reality is more absurd than any satire my creativity could allow me to create.
So instead of reading about Skamvestment holdings, for now, just look into CSHD, SSSU, or AWYB
I heard that a well-known New York entrepeneur is involved with this stock.
The company is apparently incoroparated in Sealand already! This is huge!!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sealand
Skamvestment begins shooting "The nobo effect", it's first feature film for distribution in early 2007.
Wednesday October 11, 9:00 am ET
Wasighinton, NJ --(MARKET WIRE)--Oct 11, 2006 -- Skamvestment Holdings Incorporated (Other OTC:SKAM.PK - News) ("SKAM") announced that they have commenced filming on their first feature film, "The nobo effect"
In the film two daring corporate execs fight an army of mutant vampire shorts armed only with a nobo list.
"This is an exciting time for shareholders" said CEO David Diglio, "I wrote the screenplay for this while I was in jail awaiting bail and I don't mind saying it's a cinematic masterpiece."
Skamvestment Holdings expects that the film will be completed in 2007 for immediate distribution. The film will be shot on a budget of $250 and expects to gross $10 million in revenues plus DVD sales. CEO David Diglio and CFO Mark Conors star in the film.
"The revenue potential from a blockbuster movie is almost unlimited. I expect this to be a blockbuster on the level of Shrek or Titanic. So when you think of our company, think of the Titanic." Diglio said.
This contains forward-looking information within the meaning of The Private Securities Litigation Act of 1995. Forward-looking statements are in essence complete guesses and enable companies to create dilusional press releases and not be held accountable. In addition the existence of this company, and every single word you've just read, is nothing but the satire of a deluded individual. Any resemblence to actual scam companies is completely intentional, though I doubt you'll be able to prove that in a court of law.
SKAM in the news again today. IMO it's free press, hopefully people will read the police reports and think "gotta get me some of that SKAM" on the downside since our CEO is in jail, i wouldn't expect any PRs though the IPO is still expected for friday.
From the Annandale Post:
"A local man was arrested late Tuesday after being spotted in downtown Washington, NJ jumping on top of parked cars singing 'Werewolves in London' by Warren Zevon at the top of his lungs. The man was identified as David Diglio, 34, who is supposedly the CEO of a company called Skamvestment Holdings.
After being approached by police officers Diglio shouted obscentities, urinated on one officers shoe, threatened the officers, then attempted to bribe them with shares of his company Skamvestment in exchange for "forgetting this happened".
"Clearly this man is a lunatic, he kept calling me 'shorty' and referring to me as an employee of NITE." said arresting officer Mike Willis.
Diglio remains in jail after using his one phone call to contact ADP to order a NOBO list. He will be arraigned on thursday for charges of public intoxication, resisting arrest, assaulting a police officer, public urination, bribery, and disturbing the peace.
the company has been quiet lately, david couldn't pay this month's phone bill so the fax machine has been shut down. hopefully after the IPO they'll be able to fix that and start faxing out the PRs faster than a cheap hooker gives away STDs
MOVERZandTWITCHERZ.com profiles Skamvestments
twitcherzzz gives it a : kablamo, WEEEEEE
Skamvestment Holdings Updates Shareholders on SEC Filings. Thursday October 5, 9:01 pm ET
Wasighinton, NJ --(MARKET WIRE)--Oct 5, 2006 -- Skamvestment Holdings Incorporated (Other OTC:SKAM.PK - News) ("SKAM") today issued a press release updating shareholders on the status of their SEC filings required for listing on the OTC BB exchange.
The SEC filings were delayed by the unexpected conviction of Skamvestment's CFO and VP of finance, Mark "the shark" Conors. The shark was sentenced to 30 days of house arrest and 3 years of probation for engaging in sexual conduct with a minor over the internet. His house arrest is set to end October 10th, at which point the company accountants will begin their audit.
"We expect the audit to be completed fairly quickly as the company has virtually no assets and has booked no revenue to date." said Conors "Still, our audited financials will prove to the world that this company is a slam dunk investment, and will prove to a certain judge that shall not be named that he messed with the wrong f**king mother f**ker this time."
Skamvestment Holdings Announces purchase of Atlantic Ocean
Thursday October 5, 9:00 pm ET
Wasighinton, NJ --(MARKET WIRE)--Oct 5, 2006 -- Skamvestment Holdings Incorporated (Other OTC:SKAM.PK - News) ("SKAM") announced that they were in the final stages of negotiation over the purchase of the Atlantic Ocean.
"This is an exciting time for shareholders" said CEO David Diglio, "and this news should cause a feeding frenzy like a crippled lamb in a piranha tank prior to our IPO"
Skamvestment Holdings expects that revenue from the Atlantic Ocean purchase could exceed "lots and lots of money" and expects that completion of the deal will cause "major KABLAMOOOOO" with it's stock price once the deal is completed.
"The revenue potential from the Atlantic Ocean is almost unlimited, each year dozens of people use it to swim, sail boats, and dump evidence after committing crimes." Diglio said.
Additionally, Skamvestment hopes to earn revenue by charging rent to mermaids, and recruiting fish into a mercernary army in preparation for an attack on Europe.
This contains forward-looking information within the meaning of The Private Securities Litigation Act of 1995. Forward-looking statements are in essence complete guesses and enable companies to create dilusional press releases and not be held accountable. In addition the existence of this company, and every single word you've just read, is nothing but the satire of a deluded individual. Any resemblence to actual scam companies is completely intentional, though I doubt you'll be able to prove that in a court of law.
Contact:
Contact:
David Diglio
1-800-WE SCAM U
SKAMVESTMENTinc@yahoo.com
http://www.skamvestment.com
is this a skam?
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