Tornado Alley (PROG)

[dbleagl]

Atheist Sees Image of Big Bang in Piece of Toast

For Immediate Release: Miracle Toast?

(ACPA-london) Excitement is growing in the Northern England town of Huddersfield following news that local atheist Donald Chapman saw an image of the Big-Bang in a piece of toast. In an exclusive interview with "The Huddersfield Express" Chapman, 36, explained that he was sitting down to eat breakfast when an unusual toast pattern caught his eye.

"I was just about to spread the butter when I noticed a fairly typical small hole surrounded by a burnt black ring, right in the middle of the bread." said Chapman. "But then I noticed the direction and splatter patterns of the crumbs - they were flowing outward from the center of the black hole, with changing shades as distance from the center grew. It's a perfect match to the chaotic-dynamic non-linear patterns that followed the Big-Bang. It's the beginning of the world, right there in my breakfast!" Images of the actual Big Bang toast are copywrighted by Don Chapman so we can only show this image which is a US Govt public domain picture

Ever since news of the discovery made national headlines, local hoteliers have been overwhelmed by an influx of atheists from all over the country who have flocked to Huddersfield to catch a glimpse of the scientific relic. "I have always been an Atheist and to see my unbelief validated on a piece of toast is truly astounding," exclaimed one guest at the Huddersfield Arms hotel.

To the surprise of many, the UK Atheist Association has asked its members to ignore the story despite its potential to inspire less faith. "Given what the religious believe already, this is an easy sell," complained one disgruntled activist who said he was going to Huddlesfield anyway noting that "Seeing is not believing."

http://www.satireandcomment.com/0208toast.html