I know you are speaking tongue in cheek. As for the name change, you will need to contact admin. You may need to delete your account and start a new one.
If you scroll down (if the link doesn't anchor to the specific query) the page, it explains how. Basically you do a search 1sy to make sure your choice is available & if so, contact admin & they will take care of it. Sorry if someone else has already answered this, I didn't check.