Anon, oh please quit drinking. You are so sweet and precious. God loves you unconditionally. He wants to help you, but you have to do your part. Pour out whatever it is that you are drinking and go lie down. Everything is going to be okay. Can you say what has you so down? If not, it's okay. I guess it is about the family you were talking about. Get back to me please.
i am drinking too much. but it is the only way I can get out the saddness, depression, and the grief.
Anon, if I recall correctly you lost your husband a while back.
Now on top of dealing with what can take years to get over that you are taking care of your Mother also which is a HUGE STRESS situation.
Been in your shoes trying to mask the pain before all the while like you also knowing scripture tells me there is NOTHING the grace of God can not get us through.
I know a thing or two about alcohol. Use to be a professional drinker. If you going to do something I excel at it. Not a joke, just my nature.
Over the long journey through drugs and alcohol I saw many people die from it. Some close to me, others just party people, the so called friends.
Then I met my wife whose parents were alcoholics. They were divorced due to alcohol ruining their marriage.
After my own Dad my Wife's Dad was my best friend. He'd call my Wife and I almost every day.
We went to Canada just him and I salmon fishing. We had a great relationship. He was like a second Father to me.
Make a long story short I went to her Dads house cause last time I saw him he was starting to turn yellow again and I wanted to check on him. He had been in the hospital before from his liver but this time was different.
Told him get up, get your stuff packed. Your going to the hospital or I'm going to drag you there your choice.
Ten days later he was dead from alcoholism. Three days after that my own Father died from cancer. It was hell.
Still grieve them both after 13 years I miss them badly. I see my Father in me so much.
My father-in-law knew God, but like a lot of us using what ever means he tried to get through the pain in the bottom of a bottle.
He knew God but didn't trust God all the way to deliver him.
My Wife's Mom died from alcohol few years later.
So why am I telling you this?
Because we have choices to make.
We can go get the bottle and empty it in the sink all the while asking the Holy Spirit to fill us with his love and strength or we can leave our boot straps down on the floor and continue down the same road to destruction. The choice is yours.
In order for God to help us we must make the move to be helped.
Moving that drink to your lips is not the move in the right direction. You know that, I know that, been there more then I can recall many years ago.
I've seen the destruction, the death, the tears, the dreams, the broken lives, the broken souls, and I know the only way to heal is to trust in God.
Neither our selves, nor the bottom of a bottle can cure the memories, the empty feeling from what we have lost, what financial problems, family problems, what ever it is we are facing today unless we give it to God.
Place your Trust in the great I AM!
It's not easy. I know I've held on to many as they went through alcohol hell.
Anyone can write a post saying what I did and the person reading saying but you don't know how bad I hurt. Much easier just to maintain through alcohol then go through the shakes etc.
You right, I don't know how bad you are hurting.
What I do know is there is a man who thought about you long ago.
His name was Jesus.
As they spit on him, whipped him, hit him, he knew he could stop it.
He could stop all this pain right now and the pain to come.
Not only the physical pain, but the agony of the separation from his Father on the cross for that small amount of time.
Yet, knowing all of this, something you and I can't even begin to wrap our minds around the pain he thought of all the Anon's of the world.
He said to you by his actions as he continued the walk to the hill I love Anon to much to stop, I must keep walking to my death.
It will be worth it cause my Father said he will get me through death, separation from my Father, then three days later I rise from death to give life to all if I do his will by continuing to walk to the hill.
He walked loving you and all the rest of us in a time where he could have said no God I can't take it anymore, I can't.
He cried out on the cross like we cry out today.
And like the cross sometimes there is like a separation from God's love yet all the while God was in the back ground waiting for us to do the will of the Father, trusting in the Fathers voice.
You can get through this.
First step is to tell God you are going to need his strength 24/7.
Tell him you are going to the sink and you are going to throw away what you've been taking in place of the love his son had for you that day as he walked for us all to his death.
Find yourself someone you can talk to. Someone you can call to come along side of you when you feel you need a drink.
Ask God to give you a drink of his living water to fill you so full up you lose the desire to drink alcohol in the wrong way.
You can get through this, Jesus did, and like when Jesus was going through his time the Father was tjhere for him like he is right now for you.
But like Jesus did, you need to take the first step.
“The LORD bless you and keep you; the LORD make his face shine on you and be gracious to you; the LORD turn his face toward you and give you peace.”’ Numbers 6:24-26
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