Replies to post #71224 on Biotech Values

[Biowatch]

I don't know if there are different levels of aggression between men and women with dementia, but I have heard stories of husbands not recognizing their wives (and vice versa), then going ballistic when they saw an "intruder" in their house. (Often, they have no idea what "house" they are in.)

My mother had dementia, and was legally blind, along with other ailments. Fortunately, she always knew that I was someone in her family long after she forgot she had children.

This was good, in that she never accused me of being an intruder. Still, it took me a long time to realize what was going on when she'd ask, "Do you remember those songs we used to sing at camp when we were children? or "Do you remember the time you had a bad case of poison ivy before the school performance?"

Shifting to childhood memories that preceded mine by decades was difficult at first. Trying to see present as the past in her mind's eye.

In the early stages of her dementia, I could bring her back to the present, but pointing out her mistakes made her upset. I realized I was doing it for me, not her. Eventually she could rarely remember the present, and I learned to smile, nod, and find something to talk about...