In Texas, "'Obscene device' means a device including a dildo or artificial vagina, designed or marketed as useful primarily for the stimulation of human genital organs." Texas Penal Code 43.21(a)(7).
Texas Penal Code § 43.23(c)(1) provides:
(c) A person commits an offense if, knowing its content and character, he:
(1) promotes or possesses with intent to promote any obscene material or obscene device;
§43.23(e) and (f) provide:
(e) A person who promotes or wholesale promotes obscene material or an obscene device or possesses the same with intent to promote or wholesale promote it in the course of his business is presumed to do so with knowledge of its content and character.
(f) A person who possesses six or more obscene devices or identical or similar obscene articles is presumed to possess them with intent to promote the same.
Of course, 43.23(g) provides:
(g) It is an affirmative defense to prosecution under this section that the person who possesses or promotes material or a device proscribed by this section does so for a bona fide medical, psychiatric, judicial, legislative, or law enforcement purpose.
The offense is a Class A misdemeanor for which the person can receive up to a year in jail and a $4,000 fine.
It is legal to posses a dildo, but it is illegal to sell them. It may be illegal to possess a dildo if its possession is with intent to promote. Of course, if one is not going to promote its use for something, there is little purpose in having it in the first place.
The price of nookie can be expensive.
Edit: Matt-Bob -- you guys need to add nookie to the spell checker database.