Unfortunately I had the same past as your father.
I started running strip clubs at 15 years old. By the time I was 17 I had a cocaine overdose.
After the overdose I never touched a drug again...... not because I didn’t want to but I had such bad panic attacks I couldn’t even smell weed without panicking. The panic attacks saved my life but unfortunately I picked up drinking. From 17 to 20 I drank a bottle of crown/covasea etc straight everyday.
By the time I was 20 I had elevated enzymes in my liver. I either had to quit or die. Smoked 2 packs a day from 14 to 24.
Met my wife at 24, became a Christian and the Lord saved my life. Changed me from the inside out. Been married from 25 to 41 to my beautiful wife. 4 healthy children from 11 to 17.
Much much much more fulfilled life living like this.
I would be lying if I said I was not scared to leave my kids and wife, It’s a scary thought.
I have a peace though that the Lord will take care. I have an internal peace that only he can give me.
I’m laying on the couch watching the Westminster dog show right now with my wife and kids all around me :)
For those who love me I do all things for your good. Not some..... all.
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