It's because some go out and buy wedding rings for the stocks of the companies they love so dear.
The problem is that most end up jumping into a raging river to fish out the ring that's still attached to what's often a corpse of what they married into, ultimately leading to their drowning.
SGLB is just one of many in the rolodex, and just like all of the others, doesn't warrant a wedding ring.
Great fun, even greater profits, but no ring needed.
I'd be more than happy to officiate though, for a fee.
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