Some psychologists suggest that unappealing, even repulsive, glee, which you have just exhibited
And what do they say about those that deflect, rather than acknowledge their mistake?
Here’s Why People Won’t Admit They’re Wrong
Defensiveness
Now, at first you might think defensiveness is only how people avoid admitting they’re wrong, but what I mean to point out here is that defensiveness is not exclusively the how part. There are times when defensiveness is so ingrained in someone that it is just their default reaction to anything. So in that sense, because they’re so bent on maintaining that stance, defensiveness itself can be why they’re unable to admit they’re wrong or apologize for something.
Equating identity and actions
Some folks have a really hard time distinguishing between actions and identity. So subconsciously, they feel like if they admit they did something they shouldn’t have, it’s nearly tantamount to them saying they’re a bad person. Or, for example, if they were wrong in their assessment of a situation at work, they must necessarily be unintelligent or dumb. That’s why an admission of wrong or an apology can be terrifying.
Pride
This one’s fairly obvious, right? To admit you’re wrong is to admit that…well…you’re wrong. Less than perfect. Not as great as you portray to others that you are. Fallible. Not flawless.
For someone who’s allowed pride to consume them, this makes it nearly impossible for them to admit and own a mistake with any sort of sincerity.
[bctt tweet=”Pride prevents people from owning & acknowledging mistakes. #leadership #companyculture”]
Experiencing shame instead of guilt
For most people, admitting we’re wrong or saying we’re sorry for something may have feelings of guilt that have preceded and/or accompany it, but other folks experience shame, which is quite different. Shame is related to who we are as individuals, while guilt is tied to what it is that we’ve done.
So as you can imagine, if it’s shame — not guilt — that accompanies admitting they’re wrong about something, it makes sense that some people avoid it at all costs.
Believing apologizing equals absolution for everyone else
Some people think that if they apologize for something, it is essentially their way of saying that the entirety of whatever it is that happened is their fault. Now in some cases, that may be true; but in other cases, it may not be. In situations where it’s not, that can prevent some folks from owning their mistakes. They incorrectly view an apology as absolving everyone else involved, when in fact an apology is really a brave and vulnerable step toward resolving a conflict.
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