Excerpt: #1 Bush is a fine fellow. #2 Dubya never tells a lie. #3 Despite the fact that all sorts of rules and regulations, such as the laws of wiretapping, and the Geneva conventions treaty, don't apply to him and his posse, he will absolutely, positively not serve a third term.
Can't tell if he's joking, but I'll give you a Nancy Grace Guarantee right here: Nobody in history has voluntarily given up this much power before, and I'm sure, because no gang in history jas ever had as much power as these Bush bastards..
They're stealing maybe $200M a day. Tell me - why would greedy oil bastards give that up?
We're going to have a horrible terrorist attack and for our safety, Bush will suspend the November election "until we can regroup and get back on our feet."