Replies to post #243640 on Tornado Alley (PROG)

[PegnVA]

Ted Cruz - 27.7$
Donald Trump - 24.3%
Marco Rubio - 23.1%
Ben Carson - 9.3%
Rand Paul - 4.5%
Jeb Bush - 2% ? - if Jeb! didn't have Super Pac $$$ he would have been gone long ago.

[arizona1]

Fiorina Declares Victory



DES MOINES (The Borowitz Report)—In a jubilant speech on Monday night, Carly Fiorina celebrated what she called her “dominant first-place finish” in the all-important Iowa caucuses.

Speaking to supporters at the Des Moines Marriott, Fiorina taunted the media for counting her out of the race. “No one gave me a chance, and here I am tonight, with ninety per cent of the vote!” she roared.

Growing emotional, Fiorina said that her victory in the Iowa caucuses was the greatest moment in her life since she “built Hewlett-Packard into the most successful computer company of all time.”

She also thanked the “countless” former Hewlett-Packard employees who stumped for her in Iowa. “The relentless love and support the Hewlett-Packard crew has shown to me just blows me away,” she said.

Fiorina said that she is looking forward to the next contest, in New Hampshire, where she said she has already raised a campaign war chest of three trillion dollars.
http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/fiorina-declares-victory?mbid=nl_020116%20Borowitz%20Newsletter%20(1)&CNDID=25956129&spMailingID=8497317&spUserID=MTA5MjQwNDE1MDIzS0&spJobID=860151648&spReportId=ODYwMTUxNjQ4S0